Confessions of a Commitment-Phobe

Chapter 02 | You're A Heartbreaker

Chapter 02 | You're A Heartbreaker

"Beauty is terror. Whatever we call beautiful, we quiver before it."
— Donna Tartt, The Secret History

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Trying to pay attention in class after what had just happened in the hall, not to mention Julian's strange mood, was like asking for the impossible.

The thing was, I actually liked English class. My teacher, Mr. Pumpernickel, despite being fated with such an unlucky last name, was actually a pretty cool dude. I felt bad for not giving his lesson on The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald my one hundred percent attention, but I was mentally and physically exhausted.

Regardless of my attempts at not thinking, I could feel the events of last night finally catching up to me, taking over my thoughts.

The shouting. The screaming, and then the sudden, almost deafening silence. The blood. 

I visibly shivered.

No matter how much I disliked the people at school, anything was better than staying at a house that didn't even begin to feel like home.

I could practically feel Julian's eyes drilling holes into the back of my head.

I stiffened and then relaxed again, in an attempt to act normally.

He wasn't fooled, he never was.

A sharp object poked my shoulder blade, but I didn't dare turn around to face the man sat right behind me.

Instead I continued to doodle on the margins of my notes, ignoring him.

The rest of class continued like this; him poking me, me ignoring him.

But we'd played this game before and I was used to it, not mention stubborn as hell.

"Well, heathens, I need to go make more copies of the work since some of you, not going to name any names, seem to house paper stealing fairies in their backpacks." He threw a pointed look at Jamie Fields who somehow found a way to lose his papers every single day. "Please don't destroy anything while I'm gone."

The class snickered and as soon as Mr. Pumpernickel left the room, started to chat amongst themselves.

I pulled out my phone from my backpack, about to plug in my headphones, when Julian spoke up.

"You going to keep pretending I don't exist, sweetheart? I'm hurt."

I considered ignoring him again, but finally caved. "You sure do sound it," I replied simply, still glancing at the screen of my phone.

I heard the sound of the chair scraping across the floor and when I glanced up, Julian was crouched in front of my desk.

"Can I help you?" I asked.

His grin was practically sinful. "Oh, I have plenty of ideas of ways you could help me out, but sadly, we are in a classroom and I'm not sure the other students or Mr. Pumpernickel would appreciate it." He paused as if in deep thought, "Well actually—"

"Don't you dare finish that thought," I warned him.

He chuckled, before quickly sobering up, just like that. At times I was envious of Julian's ability to switch off his emotions so quickly. His face turned serious as he looked straight into my eyes, his gray eyes intense. "Brian's having a party tonight, after the game. You going?"