"Most of the important things in the world have been accomplished by people who have kept on trying when there seemed to be no hope at all."– Dale Carnegie
Expectations vs Reality is like I was really amazed to see how beautiful the actresses in the movies, like they are goddess with a snow like skin in white that my white natural skin will be too visible when I get near them, but meeting them in person shocked and doomed me realizing that I was whiter that her and yeah she's beautiful but not as she looked like in the television imagine that I expected that much but reality opens my small eyes haha don't laugh I have a small eyes that made me looked like a Chinese girl well I can't blame them my great grandpa is a Chinese and I got that appearance so as a grown up Filipino I was used to be mistaken as a chinese, korean, and even japanese haha but I promise my blood is a 99.9% filipino and I'm proud of it.
I'm an 18 years old girl I'm a err... Fat one haha lol don't worry i'm not ashamed about it but I'm proud in every pounds of my body. Well I been bullied because I'm fat they calling me in different names like pig, elephant, dumbo, and even tomboy he he forget to tell you that I was a bit, nah uh not just a bit but its very visible, I dunno but I think was used to it when my mama worked abroad I was just 4 years old back there and she worked there for a year so I'm left with my papa he teaches me basket ball and chess and sometimes you wouldn't believe it but its true I used to copy him when he's going to urine I also stand hahaha I missed those days hehe but time flies too fast and i grown up so fast that I wish I wouldn't , when I was still little and have all the innocence in the word, I want to grow up fast and work to have a lot of money and toys and to made my own mansion but reality slapped on my face to wake up and now I faced reality for Goodness sake sometimes I want to go back at my mother's womb and be born as a baby again to escape my problems but I can't I was big enough and even taller to mama reality let me felt how it feels to be rejected on the first work I ever applied I felt so worthless that night, after that i passed trough a lot of work rejections hmmmm
" ms Cruz go inside the HR office thanks" called by the lady I think she's her assistant
"Thanks " me and enter the room I felt so confident though inside my soul is shaking , the moment I get inside she ask to sit and I sit properly Like a very feminine that contradict my personality as boyish I wear a long sleeve plain cotton black shirt and a white office skirt and a doll shoes with a 3 inch heels that really give so much pain in my feet I'm not used to it and wearing light make up and lipstick Gosh I feel like I was having a live nightmare i feel uncomfortably wearing this kind of stuff eeww but I have to I'm desperate to find job and resume my college.
" Ashtone Jade Cruz" the HR calls my name and it gives goosebumps to me and my soul jump out to my body but despite of being nervous I choose to hide it
"Yes maam ?" Me with confident voice and she speak again without looking at me
"How do you know our job opening?" Calm but a bit authoritative voice so I felt the same nervous but still pretend that I'm not
"My friend tells me" I politely answer that made her look at me
" who's that friend of yours?" HR with very interested voice
"Mr Celistin Francis Smith ma'am" i answered cheerfully and give my smile to hidden my feeling gosh i feel like in a moment i will burst out my gosh m bladder is full and i really need to let it go gosh i was so tense like i will die after this interview i really need this
"oh!" she's shock " Are you sure?!" she disbelief asked that make my knees go weak like a jelly i know any moment i get up here i will fall easily
" Yes Ma'am " i politely answered so she couldn't sense that i'm feeling so hopeless
"wait Ms Cruz i really need to talk with someone i hope you don't mind if i leave you here in a few minutes" she said i with a voice that horrified me o m g is Mr smith a scammer and i i'm he's remedy oh my g .
"um yes ma'am " i answered with smile then she leave i was left on her office and felt a bit of comfort then suddenly a the door opens the heck the heck she's back but i was wrong it was a man who i think same age as mine and he's really focused on his phone he closed the door without removing his eyes on the phone and finally he sees me and he fell in love at first sight and he gets my number but i was conservative i won' give it .
then he kissed me on the cheeks hat makes me awake from my day dreaming so i punch him on his face
"ouch sh*t" he murmured without looking at me he said trying to calm his voice " mom i don't have a guidance letter this day so what was that for?"
"oh baby i think you've kissed the wrong person hihi" HR at my side giggling about what her son got
"oh sh*t! f*ck sh*t" that's all what comes out from his mouth cursing word
"aren't you going to apologize for what you did?or you'll just cursed me all day" i sarcastically say to him then he looks at me i expected that he will but he just laugh the f*ck where is this man's manners i hate him he go out and leave but my blood boils already cant help it but i really need to punch someone or something to remove my anger so i punch the wall and as expected the HR will laugh but one of my expectations didn't happen
"i almost hired you but after what you did to this poor concrete wall makes me change my mind so i'm so sorry ms.cruz but the door is wide you can leave now"
she announced that makes my tears runs to my face the HR fake cough makes me realized that i'm crying and i hurriedly wipe it and get all of my things and smile at her despite of my disappointment of not getting the job and thank her and leave.
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