How I Get the Boy

5. Gone Missing

Ariel was early at my house. I didn't know why but it sure surprised me. I stuffed my things in my backpack and bid my goodbye to mom before heading out.

"Why are you here again?" I asked.

"Just making sure you won't be a sad, little girl again," she said.

The bus arrived. When we got inside, I roamed my eyes and searched for Connor. I hadn't seen him this morning. Usually, he's with Ariel but they weren't together. I wondered if he was sick.

"Maybe we should take a seat," Ariel whispered in my ear.

I nodded and sat on the nearest empty seat. I turned to her the moment she took a seat beside me. "Where's Connor?"

She didn't seem surprised that I asked that question.

"He's gone," she said in nonchalance.

"What do you mean... he's gone?" I asked, confused. He was just in my room the other night. How come that after a day, I'd hear that he's gone? She just shrugged, though. I didn't know if I should follow up another question or leave it at that.

"Don't worry. He'll be back before you even know it," she told me. She talked to the girl from across her seat and I was left alone wondering why would Connor leave on a school week. He's confusing as hell. I wanted to find out what happened to him. Sure what happened the other night wasn't the reason. There might be something deeper than that.

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I was in deep thoughts when I heard a knock in front of me. Mr. Kirby stood with his arms crossed. "Care to say what I just said?" he asked.

I stood up with a shake of my head. I daydreamed way too long that I didn't notice him. I took a breath before saying, "I'm not paying attention." There were snickers in the room. I looked around and some of them were whispering, obviously it's all about me. I wondered why the sudden turn. Maybe it's because I was the new girl and everyone thought that I was weird. Maybe they wanted a new center of attraction and lucky me, I was that one they chose. But whatever those thoughts in their minds were, it's not something I truly like.

Mr. Kirby stuck up his nose in the air, clearly not happy with what I said. "Stay after class," was what he said before walking back to the front.

I sighed as I took my seat again.

The girl on my left seemed unaware that I could hear her. She's whispering to the girl in front of her.

"Connor is gone again," she said.

My ears perked up upon hearing Connor's name.

"I know, and last time I saw him was with her. Do you think she knows?"

Know what?

"Seems like she doesn't." Then they snickered.

I wanted to run outside but I wasn't that kind of person. The only thing I could do at this point was endure them whispering behind my back and hoped that this day would at least end on a happy note.

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I remained seated on my chair as we waited for everyone to get out of the classroom. When the last person stepped out, Mr. Kirby cleared his throat.

"Ms. Sinclair, I know you're new here," he started, "but not paying attention to your teacher is not something new I should be teaching you about."

I looked down on my desk. Clearly, I wasn't off the hook that easily.

"I'm not going to scold you or anything. I just want you to know that in my class, daydreaming is not allowed. Not even sleeping, if you're planning to ask that one. I want all of you to learn. Especially that you're a transferee. It's almost the end of the year. Do you think you can keep up with everyone?" he asked. By the looks of it, he wasn't fond of students not giving education the importance.

I wasn't the type of person to not pay attention in class as well. But Connor had been in my mind since this morning. I hadn't seen him anywhere and I was kind of worried for the guy. We talked. He was okay. I wondered where he was.

"Ms. Sinclair? Are you even listening?" Mr. Kirby rose his voice.

I paid my attention back to him, nodding. "Yes, sir. It won't happen again." He eyed me for a few seconds before dismissing me.

Ariel was waiting for me outside the classroom. "What's going on?" she asked.

I wanted to ask that to her too.

I shook my head, ignoring her. I went straight to my next class.

"Care to even answer me?" Ariel kept on following me.

I turned around and faced her. With a sigh, I answered, "Because I don't know what's going on. Ariel, I know you're dating Connor but I've been thinking about him. I've known him for a few days and it really pisses me off that I'm thinking about him."

She didn't seem mad at me for saying those words. She shrugged. "You shouldn't worry about him." She stared at her nails, then added, "And I'm not romantically her girlfriend, just FYI. People know that very well."

She acted like one though. "Romantically or not, aren't you even worried about him?"

"Of course, I am. But you know what, he's been doing this. This is not the first time and I'm already used to it. Everyone is used to it."

I blinked twice, my brows furrowing. Without another word, I turned my back and continued my walk to my next class.

It's been a thing. Connor would walk out everytime and not one single person would worry about him. He didn't show any signs that he was sad or in need to be alone. It would be a funny thing to say that I knew him very much but I knew I didn't. There was not a single thing about him that I know.

I bit my bottom lip as I took my seat. I was not getting any familiarity to this place but I was getting attachment. Attachments were not safe.

"You're Mary?"

I looked to my right and there's a guy smiling right at me. "I think there's no other Mary here, so yeah. And who are you?" I asked, my nose scrunching up in the end.

He extended a hand for me to shake. "I'm Ansel. Nice to meet you."

I looked at his hand, then back to his eyes. I gave him a nod before facing the front. I heard him cleared his throat but then the teacher entered the classroom, so I didn't listen to what he said.

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It was the end of the day and I was on my way home when Ariel showed up at the gate. She raised an eyebrow as if asking me if I would still ignore her. I remained quiet. If she's waiting for me to say sorry, I wouldn't say it. I had nothing to apologize for. I just voiced out what I wanted to say.

"Connor said to me last night that you'll try to open up. At least do what you said to him," she said. I didn't like the sound of it. It was as if he's not coming back anymore.

I shook my head. "I can't open up to people who suddenly disappear on me. I don't want to feel what my old friends feel whenever we move out and I don't get the chance to say a proper goodbye, because I know that's going to hurt real bad and I won't be able to move on that quick and that's the last thing I want to happen," I said in one sentence. I pointed to myself. "If I want to open up, I want it to be because I want to. Not because, you people, want me to."

She inched closer, her face turning red. "I'm trying to be nice here, Mary. So it's up to you if you're going to be nice too. And as far as I can see, you're not trying to be nice. Since you're around this town and pretty much you're going to meet a lot of people who live here, I suggest that you try to be nice." She shoved me on my shoulder before going away. I watched her back, my eyes starting to become blurry.

I wanted to shout back at her, say that I didn't plan on meeting them and it's them who approached me so they shouldn't oblige me to do things I had no plan to do. But my sob caught in my throat and all I could do was cry.