Saved? (Niall horan)

ch.12

Julianne's Pov

"Julie you don-" "I'm not wanted here.....I never was...I was fucking pathetic to believe you guys actually liked me....you could've at least pretended." I cut liam off. I looked him in the eyes and shook my head then walked away.

"finally.." I heard Niall's girlfriend said as i walked away

"I know...I don't even like her." Niall said

I stopped walking then turned around and walked back

"REALLY?! YOU'RE SHITTING ME RIGHT? BECAUSE LAST TIME I FUCKING CHECKED YOU LEFT A HICKEY ON MY NECK!" I laughed sarcastically

"your infatuation with me is so fake that it's pathetic." Niall said

"INFATUATION?!" I asked

"yes. it's a word, look it up." he retorted

"cool, because I always thought you liked me.....I was so pathetic to think that wasn't I?" I asked

"Julie I-" "fuck you....go fuck your girlfriend in the restroom for all I care" i said cutting him off

"don't try to find me because you sure as hell won't find me." i said walking out...and this time I don't know if I'm coming back....

Why the hell am I always the one to choose the wrong people to trust? Am I really that vulnerable? Or is it just desperation to finally breathe....to finally feel like I belong somewhere?

"julie...you do know that I have to go to work right? I love you, baby girl. I'll call make sure to do your homework...okay?" and that was the last thing i heard from my mom...I remember i sat by the phone waiting for her to call. I was about 7. My dad started pacing back and forth and broke into tears. I ran up to him and wrapped my tiny arms around his neck to comfort him. We sat there crying for about 20 minutes, I didn't know why I was crying but my dad was crying so my instinct was that something bad happened.

The next morning I heard the phone ring then I got out of my small pink bed that I really liked....That's because I was 7 and loved the color pink. I climbed on the chair to pick up the phone and the first thing I asked was "mommy?" but it turns out it was it was a nurse from the hospital, she said "hi..is your daddy there?" I called for him but there was no answer...I wodered where he was, so I just told her that he wasn't home. That's when anger kicked in, both my dad and I. I was mad at my dad because he left me alone, and i think that's how he felt when my mom died.

"you killed her, julie." I said to myself and repeated it over and over. She wasn't going to work...she was going to New York to get a flight back with my best friend that I knew since I was about 1...then she moved. but my mom crashed on her way to the airport.

"why the hell do people say there's a good to every bad? To me there isn't if no one ever noticed that." I remember when my dad came back he was drunk and that's where it all started. The abusing, I actually thought I wasn't going to live through it...at the age of 7 i thought i was going to die....

"I need a hotel.....I'm not going back there!" i said to myself. Niall thinks that he can just use me and play with my head.

I have about $100 on me....don't ask....I just do. Wait no never mind I have $250. How the hell did that happen?

I got a hotel room for one night, I'm going to find somewhere else...I think I should go back home. Nonononononono.No. you are not.

I walked into the hotel room and sat on the bed. the worst part of the years flashed through my head over and over and over

"you killed her! you!"

"your infatuation with me is so fake that it's pathetic."

"worthless."