Life is a tragedy full of joy

I miss him

Two quiet, lonely weeks had passed by and yet there was still no sign of Remus. It would be an understatement to say Tonks was worried, however, she attempted to distract herself as she lay back on the sofa reading an issue of the Quibbler, frequently edited and published by Xenophilius Lovegood, to try to relax her mind a bit. Usually, Xenophilius Lovegood came across as a bit bonkers, with his crazy research and findings, such as wrackspurts which his daughter, Luna, often spoke about when she was at Hogwarts, but nowadays the Quibbler was the only source of media that made any sense and actually spoke the truth about what was going on in the Wizarding World.

It had been a constant battle recently to try to get any form of sleep due to Tonks's underlying fear and worry, thus resulting in her eyes being very red and sore. Despite reading the Quibbler, she actually began to feel her eyelids droop and her grip on this week's issue slacken, before it dropped to the floor with a soft thud, as her body finally succumbed to a well-needed and well-deserved rest. Her hand had instinctively wrapped protectively around her small bump, a habit which she had adopted the past couple of months. The last thing Tonks remembered was looking through a blurry vision of her mother pulling a warm and snugly blanket over her, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear and leaving a kiss on her temple, as her eyes eventually closed and she drifted off into a peaceful and welcoming sleep...

"So what is this place?" Tonks questioned Mad-Eye curiously.

"Shush Nymphadora! Are you trying to expose us? Patience!" Mad-Eye angrily replied as they walked towards the entrance of Number 12 Grimmauld Place. She had just recently joined the Order of the Phoenix and was about to engage in her first Order meeting, so Tonks found herself slightly nervous.

Tonks's hair flamed a dangerous, fiery red, just like it did every other time someone called her by her given name, Nymphadora. "Don't. Call. Me. Nymphadora!" she bit the words out, before pulling a face at him from behind in annoyance.

Mad-Eye abruptly stopped and turned around, his left eyebrow quirked upwards. "Do you think I can't see you pull a face at me? Now are you 23 years old or 5 years old?"

Tonks's cheeks immediately flushed as she momentarily forgot about Moody's magical eye. "23" she mumbled, feeling as though she was back in school and Professor McGonagall was sternly reprimanding her.

"Then start acting like it. Christ sakes, you're about to going into an Order meeting."

Before Tonks had even had a chance to retort, Mad-Eye had reached the front door, opening it as it lead them down into a very dark, eerie and narrow hallway. However, before Tonks could even grow accustomed to her new surroundings, she found her face directly opposite the dusty floor, making her wheeze slightly, the dust catching in the back of her throat, as a woman let out a blood-curdling scream, "FILTH! SCUM! BY-PRODUCTS OF DIRT AND VILENESS! HALF-BREEDS, MUTANTS, FREAKS, BEGONE FROM THIS PLACE! HOW DARE YOU BEFOUL THE HOUSE OF MY FATHERS-"

The sound of the woman's screeching voice stopped abruptly and Tonks, who was still faced down on the floor, turned her head to find a masculine hand outstretched to her. Tonks gratefully accepted and was pulled up to find herself in a sea of golden haze. She found herself completely mesmerised, for she had never seen a colour so beautiful, but was soon pulled out of her trance at the sound of a man clearing his throat.

"Are you okay?" the man asked.

Tonks felt a creeping sensation as her skin turned bright red from the neck up. She was beyond embarrassed. She had barely made it through the front door and she had already made a fool of herself. Typical. How was she meant to be a part of the Order if she couldn't even make it down a simple hallway?

"Er...yes, I'm fine thanks, just tripped over that stupid umbrella stand over there."

The man chuckled, "Well try not to make a habit of it unless you like listening to Mrs Black regularly? However, I'm sure you'll soon realise you don't. She isn't a very pleasant woman."

"Mrs Black?" Tonks questioned.

"My mother or great-aunt as she is to you," a man, with shoulder length wavy, black hair, voiced from the side of her, standing in the doorway.

"Sirius," she breathed. She couldn't quite believe that he was standing there beside her. The last time she had seen her cousin she was only nine years old, meaning she had very few memories of him.

"In the flesh," Sirius grinned as he embraced her into a tight hug. After a minute or so they pulled back and Sirius looked over at Remus, "So, it seems as though you've already met my dear cousin Moony?"

"It appears that I have," Remus smiled, "Forgive me, I'm Remus Lupin, best friend to this prat."

"Hey!" Sirius exclaimed mock offended as a cheeky grin stretched across his handsome face.

Remus and Tonks both ignored him as Tonks introduced herself.

"Nymphadora Tonks, though you can just call me Tonks."

Remus nodded, "Very well, it is a pleasure to meet you, Tonks." She blushed as she drank in his attractive appearance. He had sandy, brown hair which was supported by a few flecks of grey here and there. He had glowing and intense yet soulful, amber eyes that left you breathless. Tonks noticed he had a long scar running from the left side of his forehead, down and across his face to the right side of his chin. He also had another one under his left eye that ran along his cheek, yet these scars made him look all the more sexy in Tonks's opinion.

Remus drew back his lips and smiled at her, he seemed to have noticed that she was staring at him, which just made her cheeks flame even more. Sirius cleared his throat and smirked knowingly, "Shall we carry on through to the kitchen so we can begin the meeting?"

Tonks just nodded soundlessly, still unable to talk from sheer embarrassment, whilst Remus replied, "Sounds like a great idea Padfoot."

Tonks felt herself being gently shaken awake by a hand but realised it was rather too big and masculine for it to be her mother's. She slowly opened her eyes and waited for them to adjust to the dim light, cast by the crackling fire beside her. Finally, she stared up into golden, amber eyes which she had been dreaming about only moments before. As soon as their eyes connected, Tonks chewed her bottom lip as she felt tears brimming. Her tears began rolling down her face and dropped off her trembling chin as Remus, who was sitting on the edge of the sofa, pulled her lovingly into his arms, "Shh, it's okay, I'm here now." He rubbed his comforting hand up and down her back as she whispered, "I dreamt about Sirius, he was there in my dream and I saw him so clearly...it felt so real." She paused, "... I miss him so much, Remus." He continued to rub his hand up and down before pulling back. He smiled sadly as his thumbs lightly brushed beneath her eyes, wiping away her tears. "I know you do, I miss him too."

Tonks had never quite forgiven herself for her cousin's death. She'd always believed that if she had not been knocked out during her duel with her Aunt Bellatrix, who she very much despised, then Sirius would still be alive. The first two weeks following his painful death Tonks had refused to eat, sleep, drink or pretty much do just about anything. In time, though, however, Remus made her see that she was not to blame and that Sirius had died whilst trying to protect Harry, the way he would have wanted to die. There was another moment's silence until it was broken by Tonks, "You're back?"

"I'm back," and before Remus could even process what was happening, he felt her lips crash against his hungrily as though they had been apart for years. Remus responded just as passionately as their lips moulded together creating electricity. He had deeply missed her. They eventually broke apart, albeit slightly out of breath and they leant their foreheads against each other. "I love you so much Remus" Tonks breathed. "I love you too, more than you will ever know."