Male Self Insert X Anime Girls

Male Reader X Patchouli Knowledge (Touhou Project)

This has been requested by a friend of mine I know in real life, he loves his bookworm waifu. Also I love the Touhou Project games they're fun but a hard son of a bit*h. Disclaimer I own nothing except for the story. Praise be to ZUN!!! So without further let's dive into a world where common sense doesn't apply. (E/C)= Eye color

3rd pov

It was an average day in the human village, you're just an ordinary human being who has little to no experience in magic. However your greatest strength lies within your mind, once you begin reading a book all the pages become crystal clear within your mind, and you would be able to recall what topic a certain page was in and could explain in full detail the subject in order to make people understand, and reading was your hobby whether it be fiction, or anything else. You were known as someone who is gifted with knowledge, that can easily remember a book clearly and remember how the sentence was made, however later on you heard about the Grand Voile within the Scarlet Devil Mansion, by Marisa Kirisame the second greatest youkai exterminator, also known as The Ordinary Witch. The Grand Voile is giant library that has millions of books, filled with either wisdom, magic, and facts. You remember hearing about a legend of a great library in the outside world, the Great Library of Alexandria how it had over thousands of books, and had the potential to change mankind, but it was burned down all those books laid to rest in the ashes. So the second best thing was the library here in Gensokyo within the Scarlet Devil Mansion. But from what most people say it is best to avoid going there, as there are many dangers lurking within the walls, two vampires, a time-stopping maid, and a gatekeeper. However as soon as you heard that you felt like there is something missing. Within that mansion you thought that there could be a sage, or a magician there because why have a giant library there if most of the people there don't exactly have that much time to read those many books but you decided to shelve that later. You asked Marisa to give you a ride there, and she agreed, however just not this week, she told you to wait for next week where both of you will meet in front of Keine's school. So after the week has passed, you felt fear yet excitement when the next day has come for you to see the Grand Voile in all its glory.

(Y/n)
Oh man I'm so nervous, yet I feel the adrenaline just coursing through just screaming to get hyper, and run to the mansion but I have no clue where it is. I have heard Marisa going there a bunch of times, and I assume that they let her in there, so I decided to ask her if could take me there. At first she was very denial telling, Sorry but you can't go with me it's too dangerous ze. But after a couple of tries of asking nicely she finally agreed, I was so thankful to her I decided to make her some cookies. After making them I put them in a small bag after they cooled down, and realized how late it was. Well time to sleep for tonight cause tomorrow I'm gonna see what that library is about. So I drifted off to sleep.

Next morning (Y/n)
I woke up bright and early, and began doin my daily routine, it was soon time to meet up with Marisa. Okay time to do this. Oops almost forgot the small bag of cookies I made for her, I took them and set off to Keine's school, it was there I met her the long haired blonde witch herself that wears black and white, carries a broom as well as a mini hakkero that unleashes her devasting attack, Love Sign: Master Spark. Hey Marisa how're you and where you waiting long?
Marisa: Hm oh hey (Y/n) no I just recently got here, and I'm doin fine thanks for asking how've ya been da ze?
(Y/n): Great oh yea here. (I gave her the small bag of cookies I baked for her as a sign of thanks.)
Marisa: Thanks (Y/n) (as she bites into it her face instantly changes from happiness to pure bliss) Oh man wherever ya got these cookies must've cost ya fortune, because these taste amazing ze.
(Y/n): Oh I made them myself
Marisa: (Shocked) Seriously wow they taste amazing ze, but I'll save these for later cause right now we're burning daylight ze, so hop on and let's go. (She motions me over to her broom)
(Y/n): all right let's go (but this might feel a bit uncomfortable cause I'm a guy and placing my crotch on a broom one mis-step and ow my crotch) I got on and like a woman bent on revenge skyrocketed to the sky and we made off toward the Scarlet Devil Mansion.
(Y/n): Oi Marisa don't you think we're goin a little too fast?
Marisa: What are you talking about this is the normal speed for me as she had a good laugh seeing my expression. We're almost there beyond Misty Lake there's our stop.
(Y/n): I managed to calm myself after experiencing her level of speed that could probably give that tengu girl from the BunBunmaru newspaper a run for her money. I see it a mansion dyed or painted scarlet, As we got closer I saw what appears to be a red haired woman asleep, (Could this woman be the gatekeeper? If so then why is she asleep....ah must be a slow day for her then.) After stopping which I'm grateful that it didn't hit me in the crotch causing me tremendous pain. I asked Marisa, Why did you stop? Only to look back at me with a smirk filled with mischief and glee. (I have a bad feeling about this,)
Marisa's POV
After laughing at (Y/n)'s expression I looked behind and told him behind Misty Lake there's our stop. He nodded as we proceeded forward, I then stopped in place when we got near and see China asleep. I decided to use the doorbell, as soon as I got my mini hakkero ready, my passenger asked me, "Why did we stop?" I just gave him a smirk that signifies get ready for crazy stuff to go down. I screamed as loud as I can, HEY CHINA, STOP FALLING ASLEEP SO MUCH ZE!!!!! After that China's eyes immediately opened and her rage began to seep through.
Meiling's (China) POV
As I was having a good nap, I then heard someone shoutout the forbidden word, because it irritates me that nobody bothers to remember my name. I looked around and noticed the thieving witch and it seems that she's brought a human to go along with her. I decided to not let her disturb Lady Patchouli and got my spell cards ready if she hadn't pulled out her mini hakkero so quickly and use her attack.
??? POV
As I was reading my book I heard screaming and the familiar sound of a laser, and I knew it was her. Why won't she leave me alone I thought to myself, but I just asked myself a stupid question, She willingly comes here to steal my books, and says she'll return them later when she's dead. The term that I hate the most when she says it, because she'll never give those books back. So I prepared myself, I got ready my spell cards, and waited for her to arrive that way I can stop her from stealing my books.
Marisa's POV
I got my mini hakkero ready, and shouted LOVE SIGN: MASTER SPARK!!!!!!!! From my mini hakkero a rainbow colored laser appeared and I blasted China along with the gate, that was how I used the doorbell here, (If it ain't flashy, it ain't magic da ze) So I turned back to my passenger and smiled So ready? His reaction is really hysterical because he looked at what I did and stared at disbelief.
(Y/n): Marisa?
Marisa: Yes
(Y/n): Was that really necessary?
Marisa: I grinned and told him yup
(Y/n): You're something else you know that
Marisa: All right now let's get goin, I flew into the mansion and to him he just stared in admiration of the architecture here, and just like outside the whole house is the color scarlet, as we made past numerous corridors, we finally reached the place. The Grand Voile.
(Y/n) This door here behind it is the Grand Voile correct?
Marisa: Yup ready to go in although I must warn ya Patchy is there, and she might be cranky because of the commotion that went on outside. You still want to go through?
(Y/n): Yea let's go by the way who's Patchy?
Marisa: She's a magician what separates me from her is that I'm a human, and she's a magician youkai.
(Y/n): I knew it, and I so called it. I knew that there would be some sort of a sage or magician there, but anyways now for the grand unveiling of this place.
(Y/n) POV
As I opened the doors to the library I stared in amazement at what this library had to offer, books are everywhere and I looked up at the ceiling and I saw even more books along with a balcony however it looks like I might have to learn how to fly in order to reach the books that I want to read. But the library itself was amazing giant, architecture was beautiful, however I wondered about something (Where is the magician normally she would be here to prevent us well Marisa that is to stop stealing her books.)
???: So you've come
(Y/n): I heard a dull yet cute voice coming from above and there I saw her the magician Patchy, she was floating behind us maybe trying to ambush us, but it would've made no sense since she announced her presence. As she flew towards us I saw that she was wearing what appeared to be purple pajamas, and I saw a little extra underneath her pajamas purple striped purple panties, when she began to land in front of us I saw that her pajamas was striped and had frills on them giving her a very cute appearance. She was also wearing a hat that had a crescent moon accessory placed there. When I looked at her she looked very cute, and that's when I stared down she had a big chest. (WOW THEY'RE MASSIVE!!!, Okay, Okay ease up and let's not go overboard. She's still a magician she might know what's goin on in my head and try to make my head explode or something like that.)
Marisa: Yo Patchy I came to borrow more books
Patchy: You always say that but you never return them and you even brought along a human to help you with your theiving habits.
Marisa: Like I said I live a lot shorter than you so you can have them back after I'm dead.
Patchy: How about now? That way I can get my books back.
Marisa: HAHAHA We'll see!!!
It looks like they are getting ready for a fight it would be best to stay out of harm's way for now, so I hid behind 6 bookshelves in case their fight got very far. As I saw Marisa and Patchy getting ready I noticed that same smirk on her face, but I told myself she's a magician she could summon some sort of magic cylinder, or have a magic mirror to reflect that attack back at her. But the match was over quickly, and I just stared in shock as the magician fell, so I ran towards her and picked her up.
(Y/n): Oi Marisa don't you think you went too far with that?
Marisa: She has to be quicker than that ze, as she had a grin on her face
(Y/n) (sigh) Patchy was it? Are you okay? As I held her I noticed how soft she is, she could be a bit chubby, and her skin was very pale probably because she hasn't gone out and get some sunlight on her.
Marisa: Hehehe Am I interrupting something cause looks like to me you have a crush on Patchy, did you really want me to take you here just so you could read books, or just help you meet your crush in person da ze. She had a very smug grin on her face when she said that.
(Y/n): I might have a crush on her but this is the first time I met her.
Marisa: Wow didn't think you would admit it, normally people would deny their feelings but you're different, looking a bit shocked and amused.
Patchouli(Patchy's) POV
I got beaten by that witch again, and fell unconscious but I felt someone grab me, I could hear what he said, it was that human, I didn't pay no attention to him, but when he said those words "I might have a crush on her" I felt my heart flutter, but it wasn't enough to win me over. But for some reason I found interest in this human, I slowly began to open my eyes to see him, he looked cute, as he stared at me with his (E/C) eyes. I couldn't stop staring at him, and I felt a blush slowly creep up my face, his voice held kindness and concern when he asked if I was okay. I replied that I was fine. And I slowly got up, and saw Marisa stashing away books in her bag. I was about to say something until my asthma caught up to me, I felt someone pat me on the back softly and hand me a glass of water from my table. I turned and saw him staring at me eyes now filled with worry, and concern. Are you sick? he asked and I told him I'm fine. He then turned to Marisa and told her, "Would you please take your mind out of the bookcase, stuffing books into your bag and help her!" Marisa then told him, "Nah she's always like that she'll be fine "See you two lovebirds later da ze! with that she took off. Marisa wait! But it was too late she was gone. And I was alone with him. He turned back to face me and told me he was sorry.
Patchouli: What are you sorry about?
(Y/n): If I had known this would happen I never would've asked her to bring me here in the first place I'm sorry Miss Patchy.
Patchouli:...(He is quite a gentle person, the way that his aura is emitting I can tell he has a kind, and gentle personality, and he hides a great intellectual influence. I may have to ask Remi in order for him to be able to visit without any trouble and it would be nice to have some company that doesn't try to steal my books.) Patchouli Knowledge.
(Y/n): Huh? Is that your full name?
Patchouli:Yes and you can call my by my nickname if you want. I wonder why did you ask the theiving witch to bring you here?
(Y/n): The reason I asked her is because of the rumor that I heard that the Scarlet Devil Mansion has a giant library, and I got curious, I found out that Marisa Kirisame goes there and borrows her books there, but I didn't take into account that her borrowing meant that she stole the books here, I'm really sorry Miss Patchouli. I was eager to come here and see what vast amount of knowledge is stored here, I heard that in the outside world there is a library that is somewhat like this but it got burned to the ground by accident.
Patchouli: The library you mentioned would it happen to be The Great Library of Alexandria, if so some of its books are within here.
(Y/n): Wow do you mind if I stayed here and read some of these books Miss Patchouli.
Patchouli: Please just call me Patchy, and I was about to ask you to stay because I need my friend Remi to see you so you can come here to visit.
(Y/n): That name Remi it wouldn't happen to be the name of Remilia Scarlet the vampire.
Patchouli: Yes the very same, so feel free to read. With that I flew to balcony and got some of the books from the library he mentioned from the outside world. Here these are some of the books that you mentioned.
(Y/n) Thank you very much Patchy