Dallas // [dean winchester] DISCONTINUED

10 - "A what?"

April 2000

"Dean, I'm so busy I need you to get off me so I can finish this." I have to finish this dissertation so I can attempt to graduate undergraduate a year early and start grad school next year.

"Come on, baby." He slips his hands under my shirt and I shoot daggers at him.

"Dean! I'm drowning in homework! I'm trying to graduate early so I can put my damn major to use!"

"Why would you graduate early?"

"Because I want to make good money, not money from bartending."

"You're making more money than me."

"I'll always make more money than you Dean, because in a few years, I'll be a practicing psychologist, while you're fucking around with monsters."

"I'm saving lives." He defends himself, and I just roll my eyes. "What's gotten into you?"

"The whole hunting thing. It's such a superiority complex." I wiggle away from Dean and sit at the end of my bed, dragging my textbook and notes with me.

"A what?"

"Dean! I don't have time to explain right now. Can I do my homework?!" I scream and he just nods and stands up.

"Do all the homework you want, Dal. We're over."

"You're breaking up with me because I want to do my homework?" I laugh. "Fine. See ya later!" I shout as he walks out. "Dick!" I say just as the door slams closed.

I don't cry. I promised not to cry over Dean a long time ago. He wouldn't answer my calls for days and then would show up outside my dorm at four am blackout drunk and battered after a hunt, and I would have to hold myself together just at the thought that he was still alive. I wouldn't hear from him for weeks because he was on hunts and didn't have the time to make a simple phone call, and I wouldn't cry, because I knew he was safe, but busy. I only see him once for an entire semester because his dad is forcing him, a twenty one year old man, around the country with him, not allowing him to do anything but hunt, sleep, and maybe have a beer, and I don't cry. I don't cry because I love him more than anything, and crying over him would make me ten times more weak than I already am.

It's not easy, deciding that you don't want to do what you've trained your entire life for. Telling my dad that I was thinking about going to college broke my damn heart. It was even harder telling him that I was going to go to my deceased mother's alma mater.

I learnt not to cry because no matter what I do, it's either my heart or someone I love's heart breaking.

/

ooh sad chapter u can tell i prewrote it bc i would never make a christmas update sad maybe i'll do a double post idk yet

well anyway, wishing everyone the merriest of christmases, happiest of hanukahs, and if you don't celebrate, a fantastic weekend!