Sanctuary; A Haylor Fanfic

Chapter 3:

Chapter 3

Christmas morning, a time usually spent with genuinely happy smiles and giddiness beyond belief. Usually Christmas is my overall favorite holiday by far. This Christmas is different though to me, unlike my parents and brother who are trying their best to pep me up, I'm pasting a smile on my lips. It's not the fact I'm not enjoying family time or the fact I'm bearing a beautiful baby, it's just that my mind is hung up on figuring out a way with my situation. It's not exactly helping Harry isn't here to talk it out with me, he's obviously in Cheshire with his sister and mother.

Mom, dad, and Austin all took surprisingly well to the pregnancy news, immediately settling for my priorty of how to solve the issue over the substitute. Thank goodness, I don't think I could take being yelled at at my current state. They act as if nothing's wrong, probably for my sake and for the sake of my sanity. Despite of the immediate heartbreak Harry inflicted earlier, all three of them agreed i had to get Harry back in the picture, especially mom. Harry had broken the news over video chat with his family accompanied by me sitting just out of the camera. There was no way I wanted to be seen if they were extremely angry. But they were understanding although at first it was a little awkward for his mother. His sister, Gemma, was apparently overjoyed by the news and had to walk out of view due to her crying. I assumed it was happy and Harry had assured me it was.

"Tay, I believe this ones yours.." Austin's voice comes into my reverie. I glance upward and notice my expression paired with staring sadly down at the carpet under my bare toes. I shake my head, snapping out from the daze and take the box wrapped in green tree paper. My heart jumps whilst seeing the recipient tag glued to the box, reading it from Harry. I glance from my parents to a hovering Austin who all have stopped opening to watch. The paper comes off easily and a tidy little onesie which a built-in bib rests. The lettering reads 'Trouble, Trouble, Trouble'. I immediately burst out laughing, clumsily leaning to the arm of the chair for support. The laugh is more a heart-wrenching racking than laugh, it actually pains me, a bit pathetic actually. I just think it's ironic how appropriate a baby outfit could be, props to Harry.

"That is so cute," I hear my mom coo in the background of my thoughts as it's passed around the room. As much as I need to spend family time this Christmas, I need to have some time with my soon to be future family. I need to talk to Harry, that's the only way to calm me down and get me focused.

"I-um.. I need to make a call, i'll be right back." I stumble as I try to find a suitable voice. Mom looks concerned, gazing at me lovingly.

"Sweetie, are you sure you're okay?" She says. Austin butts in as well, busy grabbing three presents in a hand at a time.

"Yeah, T, you haven't even opened your presents yet.." He glances up momentarily, tossing a flimsy present to dad.

"I'm fine, I'm fine guys. Don't worry about me, just go ahead and continue opening. It'll only be a few minutes to call Harry." I explain quietly, shrugging it off as if the wrenching feeling inside me was nothing. As soon as I close the door to my bedroom, my phones already dialing Harrys. Hopefully he will answer, it is pretty early.

He answers on the third ring. "Taylor, is everything all right? Did something happen? Are you alright? Is the baby okay?" Harry spouts off question after question guns-a-slinging.

"N-No, everything's alright. I just needed to-" I stop momentarily, closing my eyes and releasing a sigh. Why not just come clean, if this is going to be a relationship then I need to open up on what I'm feeling. "I needed to hear your voice."

His breath huffs into the phone in relief, "You scared me half to death, I almost trampled half the presents to get to my phone in the process." He laughs but I just feel guilt.

"I'm sorry." I whisper, not really realizing the humor of his voice seriously and taking it to heart. Just another thing to add to my insecurities at the moment.

"Taylor, I was kidding, it was literally not a doubt in my mind, I was just worried. Hey, are you okay? You don't sound so good." He says, trying to comfort me. I shake my head. Great, now I don't look good and I don't sound good. Fantastic, all I needed.

I sigh again heavily, "Honestly, no. Harry, I don't know how we're going to do this with the tour and everything and on top of that, I miss you and it just feels like my life's caving in, you know?" I ramble while etching back the tears. Harry is the only one that could totally understand my situation and the only one I'll willingly talk to.

"Yeah, I know how you feel... but i'll be back to see you before the New Year, okay? It'll work out just please don't stress yourself out, its Christmas." He says lightly. My hand runs laps through my hair. "Well, I have to get back to them before they turn on me. Stay strong for me, okay? I know you're struggling but please do this for me. I love you, alright?"

My lips try to form out the words I've said countless times in the past without success, they're lost in my throat. Do I love him? "-Harry, I-"

"You don't need to say it back, I don't want to hear it until you're sure again anyway. Merry Christmas, babe." He says and I silently send him an airborne thank you.

"Merry Christmas, Harry." I breathe out and press End, closing my fingers around the figure of the phone and pressing it to my chest with a groan. I have to face my life without Harry for a week. A week of faking smiles and crying silently behind closed doors.

••A/N
Quick Chapter. Please keep my grandpa in your prayers as he's having surgery tomorrow. I've also decided to do Sanctuary first then Affinity a little later. I just cannot make up my mind ugh.

-B-