Give Me Envy, Give Me Malice, Give Me Your Attention *Ryden*

Fate Will Play Us Out

Spencer answered on the first ring, skipping the formalities and getting straight to the point. "So'd you watch?"

"I watched."

"And?"

"And...uhhhh..." Ryan leaned against the counter in his kitchen, trying to come up with something to say.

"It's your move, man. What are you gonna do?"

"What am I supposed to do? What's he trying to do? Is he just looking for more publicity? For fuck's sake, he gets enough of that."

Spencer sighed. "Ry, you know that's not what it's about. It's just his way of reaching out."

"Yeah, well, I'd appreciate it more if he reached out a little more discreetly."

"So...what's your move?" Spencer sounded eager, and Ryan understood why. A reunion would be good for all of them, but for Spencer and Jon it would be easy. For Ryan and Brendon, things were a lot more complicated.

"What do you think I should do?"

"Well, here's the way I see it. You can go one of two ways."

"I'm listening."

"One: you could shock the shit out of him and do your own broadcast. You've never done one before; the fans would go batshit crazy. And Brendon would not see it coming."

"FUCK. THAT." Ryan said dryly. Broadcasting anything on social media just wasn't his style at all, unless it was a video of Dottie. "And what exactly would you suggest I say in this broadcast?"

"Doesn't matter. It would be pretty funny if you did, like, an acoustic version of some song. Like...what's that one called?? Somebody That I Used to Know?"

As annoyed as Ryan was, he laughed out loud. "You fucking dingus."

Spencer was laughing too, but he continued, "Or wait! What about that Dixie Chicks song? The one she wrote after she talked shit about the president and got death threats for it?"

Ryan remembered the story but couldn't think of the song. He wasn't a fan of country music, but he made a mental note to look the song up later.

Spencer continued, "Ooh, I know! That Adam Lambert one, "What Do You Want From Me?"

Ryan furrowed his brow, considered this. "That one's not bad. What the fuck does he want from me?"

"Dude. I just thought of the best one yet."

Ryan groaned, "I don't even wanna kn--"

"ENDLESS LOVE. Sing Endless Love!"

"I'm hanging up on you."

Spencer was laughing hysterically, but managed to choke out, "No, no, don't! I'm done! I'll be serious."

"Ok, smartass, so that was my first option. What's the second?"

"Option two is, I give you his number and you call him. Or text him. Or send him a fucking meme. Or a dick pic. Whatever."

"A dick pic, shithead? You can SUCK my dick. And why should I call him? What good could come of it?"

"What bad could come of it?"

"Spencer. Think about it. It would be the friggin' equivalent of opening 10,000 super-sized cans of worms."

"Hey, that would be good for the earth. All that worm shit, helping gardens everywhere."

"Ha. You're a regular laugh riot."

"I speak the truth, my sarcastic friend." Spencer said. "Anyway, I gotta go. I'll text you his number. The rest is up to you."

*****

Ryan looked up the lyrics to the Dixie Chicks song. Oooh, now that's angsty, he thought, appreciatively.

I'm not ready to make nice

I'm not ready to back down

I'm still mad as hell, and I don't have time

to go round and round and round

It's too late to make it right

I probably wouldn't if I could

He wasn't planning to broadcast anything anyway, but even if he did, that definitely would not be the song he'd choose. The whole point was supposed to be reconciliation, not further rejection and estrangement.

He looked at the text from Spencer; considered deleting it. He couldn't bring himself to do it, though. Instead he held his finger down on the 10 digits of Brendon's phone number and clicked "Add to contacts."

Just in case.