Sa'eed - The Warrior

Holding on

I sit with Maa holding her hand. Dayima had left as soon as I had returned.

"Go to sleep. You haven't slept the whole night", she says.

Though my eye lids feel heavy and I yawn consistently I do not want to go to sleep. I want to spend my every waking moment with her. After reading the letter I had realized what a great blessing of Allah a mother was! And unfortunately it is human nature to realize the value of things only after they have been taken away. I did not want that. I nod as sleep overtakes me only to jerk back awake.

"I said go to sleep", Maa says in a strict tone. It's better not to ignore that tone. I fall asleep.

It's voices that wake me up. Seher Khala and Maa are having a busy conversation. She is updating Maa regarding Zain. Oh oh.

"The poor fellow has given up on her even before trying just like you said Haleema"

"My daughter is a feisty girl", says Maa running a hand over my forehead while I continue to feign sleep. "Allah has made a perfect match for her somewhere. It's just a matter if time before she gets married".

This is not the right time for me to wake up. So I go back to sleep waking up in the afternoon. I take care of Maa's needs and sit beside her weaving baskets.

"Seher dropped a letter for you. Hammad Khan has sent it". She hands it over to me.

"It's time I met the Shehzada myself. Go to teach him as usual, I will join you two by myself late in the night. Just inform him I will be coming".

That suits me fine. In fact today will be my last lesson with Shehzada. If I convince Hammad Chachu to continue the guidance of Shehzada from there then I can cut off my ties with him and take better care of Maa. My mind is preoccupied with her. Every other thing has lost its importance in my eyes.

"You did not tell me you met Zain". I am startled from my thoughts.

"Ah, yes I did. Didn't go well, if you ask me. He is a nice person with a good humor and the ability to take things positively but I don't seem to be the type of girl he is looking for"

"That maybe so. Did you really hit him till he bled?"

I look at her sheepishly. "I did. But then it was out of defense", I retort.

"Did you apologize?"

"I did"

"Formally?", she asks.

"I guess you could say that"

"I want you to meet him again and apologize clearly. His mother Sumaiya is a very good lady and my childhood playmate"

"As you say Maa"

"I want you to meet him today. In fact it's better you leave now. You can return in time to meet Shehzada. And drop off the baskets at Dayima's home, they are piling up"

"I don't want to leave you alone", I say.

"Seher told she will return in the afternoon and stay here tonight"

"I will leave after she comes then"

"Maa", I call after some thought. "I am ready to marry Zain if you want me to"

She looks at me like as if I had grown a horn on my head.

"What has changed your mind?"

"I think it's time I settled down like you want me to"

She doesn't believe my words for a second. She is my mother after all.

"That's not true. You do not want that I know. What is making you do it?", she asks.