Prophecy: Tome of Skin

20. Mercy Mild

Things almost seemed to be looking up. The super soldiers were gone, and thanks to Angel so was the secret lab. That was not a sacrifice that was taken lightly, but she had gone out the way she had wanted to, there was peace in that. She had also managed to kill Monica, though the power vacuum left in her absence was sure to be filled soon. Things also seemed to be getting better on a more personal front, and Austin sat on the edge of his slab, able to move his legs with ease while Nina checked him over. That made Myrna happy, and she would've stayed longer, but she was tired and she knew Toby was on his way. So she left. Yet it wasn't getting any easier for her as she collided with Cliff out in the hall.

"I'm sorry," he murmured, apologizing for not looking where he was going as he adverted his eyes. She stood there hopefully, waiting for him to say something else to her. Anything. But he was quiet and it broke her heart, so she pushed passed him and started again. But he caught her. "I'm sorry."

"What is that supposed to mean even?" She wasn't bitter when she asked it, rather truly curious, and she bit her lip as she waited, refusing to turn her gaze back to him because she was afraid of what she might see. "Where do we go from here?"

"I know it's not fair to you, I really do. But you've got to give me time, I'm messed up about all of this. This wasn't supposed to happen. She wasn't supposed to happen." Cliff let out a heavy breath.

"Time for what?" Now Myrna whirled around, beholding him with tears already in her eyes. It never took much for her. "Why should this be any different now? What's changed? You told me you loved me."

"I know, it's just," before he did any more damage he stopped. If he told her he still loved Nina, and wasn't sure what he was feeling about all of it, he knew it would hurt her. If he told her he did indeed love her, and that didn't go any further, he knew that would hurt her too. "I need time."

"Then take all you need." She snapped after a moment of staring at him, wiping her eyes before turning her back once more to him and sobbing loudly. Yet she knew he would try to reach out for her and she did not want that, so she disappeared right before his eyes, leaving him to curse under his breath and collect his thoughts. He could deal with all that later, for now, he'd come for a purpose, and after straightening himself back out he turned and proceeded into the room, avoiding setting his eyes on Nina as he waited for her to leave.

"You didn't have to come. I know it's painful for you." Austin didn't need to be told to know that it was so. He sighed and turned around to look at his guest, staring at him for a small moment before nodding his head, "feels like I've been saying this a lot, but I'm sorry. You probably hate me for not telling you about Nina."

"No, I don't hate you, it's okay." Cliff shrugged, knowing that despite speaking the truth, it did hurt greatly. Still, he went over to sit beside his friend, staring at his hands instead of looking at him.

"It's not though. Everything you did, all the horrible stuff you put yourself through-almost dying-was for her. If I would've come to you, told you the truth, none of that would've happened. So I did that to you, I want to make sure you know that I understand that, I am responsible."

"Then I guess that just makes us even. Maybe that's how it's supposed to be. Either way, I still don't blame you, what would that have changed anyway? I wanted revenge on Monica for what she'd cost me, that Nina didn't want me. But that much was clear before she even left-so what good would it have done to know she was here? Things would've been the same."

"So where do we go from here?" Without knowing, Austin asked him the same question he'd just heard. Only this time, he had an answer.

"We get better, you and me. I know you've got the whole demon blood thing going on, and from what I understand it's going to be a hard habit to break. That's something I can relate to. I'm not proud of my time with Monica, and I'm not proud of what it made me into. One of the only ways I found to endure it was to drink, and now that it's over," he paused, knowing he could admit it at least to the man beside him, even if he was ashamed, "I know that I have a problem. It's twelve steps for both of us, but maybe it won't be so lonely if we take them together."