If Only We Were Us

6. Snow Angels

~Eden~

It was a few days before I was let out of the hospital. Dean gave me my rings back. The silver pentagram felt uncomfortable after so long of not wearing it. I could see the brothers.. My father and uncle were wanting to get onto another case but instead we went right to Bobby's. We weren't even there an hour before it was decided that I'd be left here.

I was torn in two directions. Since I had just gotten out of the hospital I still didn't feel right. But then again I wanted to go along. This was the reason I was brought to them, but the thought of a few more days rest was too tempting. Either way it was decided for me. I knew Dean and Sam had questions. It wasn't hard to tell they knew Luci had saved me. They wanted to know why.
Now I what little I owned was in the spare bedroom while I lay underneath a young tree. My eyes looked at the brakes in the branches to find the blue sky. My long dark hair was weaved into a braid and rested on the white ground next to me. There was the ever so familiar sound of the brush of wings as I could feel Castiel's presence join mine. Quietly he sat with his back on the trunk close to me. We sat in a comfortable silence for a little while before a question inside me made it agonizing.
"D... Did you know Dean was my father?" I found it odd to speak those words. Dean had seemed like a father figure toward me before I knew he actually was. But the only other person I had ever thought of that way was Luci. He was there, with me for so long. I knew a lot of what I knew because of him and the other two along with my mother. Gabriel and Castiel always seemed to be like my protectors and friends.
"No. I did not. I assumed someone else was your... your father."
"You didn't tell them... did you?" My breath floated in a white cloud above me. My arms moved up and down on both sides of me to make wings in the snow.
"I have told them nothing. I don't think it's the right time. And I'd have to tell them everything for them to even begin to comprehend. Right now they do not need to know most of it." He paused. "And some of it I think you should tell. You don't seem ready and neither do they."
"I can see it. I can see that they know he helped me. It freaks them out." I sat up. "How am I supposed to explain to them some things I don't quite understand myself? I don't remember most of it, but I know it happened. I just don't know Cas."
"You might in time." Castiel said softly. Turning around I placed a hand on the tree. My eyes turned blue as I felt it become better, stronger. Shifting from my knees onto my feet I looked around the blurry salvage yard as I felt another presence join us.
"Evening Cassie." I laughed as Castiel groaned. "Ede. How are you doing?"
"I feel better Gabriel." It was only slightly a white lie. I walked passed him before turning toward the two angels. My arms in the air beside me I plopped down once more. Little frozen flakes fluttered down from the sky. It was hard to see them, but I could feel them when they landed on my cheeks. I made another snow angel as Gabe and Cas curiously watched. My vision was better by the time I perfected my angel and sat up. Strangely enough things were still blurry as I set my arms around my knees. I brushed it off since I did hold onto the tree for a bit longer than I thought. I ran a few fingers through the snow as I gathered a little white powder and strategically placed it to upgrade my angel's wings. To make them look real.
"What are you here for Gabriel?" Castiel asked.
"What? So I can't come visit the girl we watched since she was this high and trying to walk?" He held his palm hardly two feet from the ground. It caused me to laugh. Normally I enjoyed Gabriel's company much more than this. But there was something off between the two of us.
"I think Cassie is right." I could feel the glare from Cas as the nickname left my lips. My vision almost completely intact now. "You seem like there is something on your mind."
Gabriel didn't hesitate to get to the point. He seemed like he wanted to, but restrained himself. "Do you remember anything about Lucifer? Of when he saved you.. Maybe before?" Castiel seemed both for and against the question.
"It's blurry." I shook my head.
"Can you try?"
"Yeah. C'mere." I motioned for him to come sit by me. Gabe did so, but made sure not to ruin the wing of my snow angel. "I've been practicing, but I don't know how much you'll see." I set my gloved hand on Gabe's shoulder. My fingers poked out of the holes, meeting the cold air. Closing my eyes I felt them change color while I tried to remember.