Awaken

Chapter Twelve

 I lowered myself under the water for a moment, feeling the rush of the hot liquid against my body. I closed my eyes, thinking about what would happen if I went back in time, to change things. When I went back and saw Elijah, I had seen a side of him that I had not thought possible. It made things easier for us, it was much better than it had been before.

I resurfaced and took a deep breath in.

"Yes." I admitted. "I would go back, but only to save the people that died for no reason, like Lana. If I could go back, knowing what I know now, I would do everything so different. I started a war, Viktor, I think any sane person would go back and change the past if they did what I did."

"What if you never met Liam? The only reason you went to Sweden to see him, was because you were on the run." Viktor said, and I was thrown off.

"How did you know that was where we met?" I asked, not remembering telling him about that. Months ago I would have never thought twice about him knowing that information, by now I was become less naive.

"Liam spoke with me, and told me about how the two of you met." I began to scrub at my body, more so for routine than for cleaning myself. "He told me about what you were doing." He said in a grim voice.

"That's none of your business." I said sternly. Why would Liam tell him that? Who was Liam telling that I tried to kill myself. I stopped scrubbing. It had hurt so bad, and I didn't want to hurt anyone else. I just wanted to be free from the consequences of the beast's actions.

"He only told me because I was at that point once, as was he. I had my two personalities clashing, and I felt like I was losing it. I didn't mind the killing so much, you and I are very different in that sense. But, I did mind feeling as if I were not the one in control." I took a deep breath, not wanting to think about that again. My two sides were beginning to cooperate, I didn't want to think about when they didn't.

"It's mine turn." I said after a long pause. Viktor could tell that he had touched on something that I didn't want to share. I stepped out of the water, and the cold air hit my body. It was freezing and I was wet, for any other person that could have meant at least hypothermia but not for me. I let my fire spread across my body, instantly boiling any water on my skin and causing it to evaporate. I was completely dry when I began to dress myself.

"Well, go ahead." He said, as I walked towards him.

"You take the bath, I'll take guard for a little bit." I said, spreading my shield out to protect the entrance. Anyone walking by would not be able to smell us, or be able to enter the cave without me at least knowing about it.

I took a seat on the stones, and watched the storm rage outside. I could hear Viktor moving around behind me, but I never looked. I didn't care about seeing Viktor with clothes off, my heart and eyes longed for Elijah.

"Ok, I guess mine would be two parts." I said as the water moved behind me. "Did you ever meet Lana?"

"Yes." He answered.

"What did you think of her, be honest." I wanted to hear from someone who was not best friends with her, I wanted to know what she was like when she was angry.

"She was an intriguing individual. She always fought for what she believed in, regardless of if it were right or wrong. But, she did have a terrible temper. She used her powers to be in charge, and to get what she wanted. She was not the best person, but I did admire her for never backing down." A terrible temper seemed to be all that my family had.

"Your turn." I said, my eyes focusing on the storm. Part of me was hoping that Liam would just stumble into the cave, and we wouldn't have to look for him; but I knew better.

"Now, be honest with me. How did you feel when you killed Lana?" He asked and my whole body went stiff. Why would he ask that? I debated not answering him, but he had answered my question about his blood mate. Besides, this was the game that we were playing and I had to play fair.

"After I killed her, I felt miserable. I was a monster, who took someone's life, someone who was only trying to help me. But during? My body craved that action, that blood spill. I wanted to express my power to everyone, to show that there was no limit to my strength." I answered honestly. "Part of me loved the feeling, it always has. But, then my sensible side realizes what I've done, and I hate myself." I said, wrapping my arms around my torso.

"You need to stop living in regret, especially when you had no control and had no idea that would happen to you. We need to practice you shifting your control over. You sleep for now, we will save our questioning for later." He said, and suddenly I felt the exhaustion that my body must have been holding back. After relaxing my muscles in the hot water, my whole body felt light and ready for sleep.

"Are you going to be able to watch the entrance from there?" I asked, moving away from the entrance but never looking in Viktor's direction.

"I have charms on the cave, just as you do." He said, and I froze. He could feel my charms?

"How?" I asked, knowing that he would know exactly what I was talking about.

"Vampire powers, or more specifically your vampire powers, are similar to magic. It changes the atmosphere, so any experienced magic wielder would be able to tell when you use your powers." He informed me. "Not only that, but since your powers are always guarding your mind, they would also be able to tell right away that you are using powers."

"So I am always at a disadvantage?" I asked, continuing to move to where I wanted to lay down. It was a softer bed of pebbles, that had been smoothed over by water that had most likely once covered the floor of the cave completely.

"In a way, yes. But, I cannot predict how powerful you are based on the power that your emit initially. I can just tell that you are using something to protect yourself, for all they would know you could have a charmed object on you and not be an actual user yourself." He said.

"So basically it informs them that either I, or someone I know is a gifted?" I asked, laying down on the ground. I looked up at the ceiling of the cave, careful not to stare at the floating orbs. The top of the cave was covered in ice, that was slowly melting due to the heat of the hot spring, causing a constant noise in the cave.

"Yes, so it does not really give the enemy much. But, chances are you will not run into many witches, especially ones who would want to immerse themselves into vampire affairs." I heard the water stir for a moment, and I could tell that he had gone underwater. I waited until he resurfaced before I said anything.

"Why don't witches socialize with others?" I asked once I heard him come out of the water.

"They only concern themselves with those of their kind. The white witches stay with white witches, and dark witches stay with dark witches. The reason white witches would stay away from vampires is because they have finally reached favor with the old gods again, and they would like it to stay that way. And dark witches believe themselves to be above vampires and werewolves, so they keep to themselves." He informed, before I heard him begin to swim further away from where I was. "Go to sleep for now, when you wake if the storm has not subsided we will train your control."

"Ok." I said, before closing my eyes and allowing exhaustion to take over.