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My first love

Addison's POV

The last thing I remember is Dr. Angelo telling me not to die. I'm in recovery. Most likely the ICU. I'm in a way a critical patent. I mean I almost died.....

Earlier in Addison's head right when the car hits the accident

Oh god! Oh god! I'm going to die. I get launched by the impact and hit my head against the cement. The pain splitters in all directions. Something hits my forehead and that's when I black out. I wake up in trauma one. All the doctors and nurses around me fade into a buzz as I slip in and out of awareness. I must have a concussion.

After surgery Addison POV

I'm dying. I feel like I'm chocking to death. I'm cold and my stomach is killing me.
"She's chocking let's get that intubation tube out please." Says a voice I faintly recognize.
"Yes Dr. Joe," a voice says and I have no idea who that is. They take out the thing that was chocking me. An intubation tube was chocking me I wasn't dying. I'm alive.

Regular Addison POV

I lay in bed feeling weak my eyes are still shut. I don't want to face anyone right now. I am a Dr. no a surgeon. Not a patent yet here I am laying in bed. I can hardly move my arms or my hands and I find the oxygen mask oddly comforting. It did the breathing work for me. I open my eyes. Still under heavy sedation everything is blurry.
"Hey," Kaden says. The sedation is really keeping me from talking so I just look at him. He understands, he is a surgeon as well.
"Hello," says the head of neurosurgery, she is also Kaden's sister. She walks over to me and shines a light in my eyes, "No bleed, just a concussion." Thank god.
I drift off into a heavily sedated sleep. When I wake I am alert enough to jerk off the oxygen mask now that it was chocking me. I remember everything that has happened in such detail...how I almost died. My heart rate increases and Kaden rushes to my side.
"Hey it's ok. Your safe. I've got you." Kaden says, "Do you,remember what happened?"
"There was a wreck. Then a car hit the wreck and I almost died." I say short and sweet.
"Ok. Your doing pretty good for post-op," he says.
"Yeah....I guess," I say.
"How do you feel?" He asks.
"My chest hurts," I confess.
"That's because you crashed twice. They had to bring you back with a defibrillator. You don't have any broken ribs though." He says.
"That's good," I say.
"I have something I need to tell you and I don't know how you are going to handle it." He says.
"Ok...." I say.
"I love you in a way I have never loved anyone before. I want to take you dancing in the rain. I want to watch stupid romance movies where everyone dies and you cry. I want to be there with you. I love you in a shout it from the rooftop kind of way. I love you Addison Bailey!" He confesses.
I take a deep breathe. No one talks for about 15 minutes. I feel the tears welling up in my eyes but this is what I have to do, "I don't love you. I came here to practice medicine, and that's what I'm going to do."
"Addison if it's to soon....." He says.
"I think you should go," I say coldly. He gets up and leaves me alone.

What just happened? Did Addison go insane or is there a deeper reason?