local {joji x reader}

eight

"she's going to be okay." the doctor said calmly.

"why would she do this?" katt whispered into max's shoulder.

"i don't know, i don't know." he keeps repeating. i'm panicking. why would she do this?

i'm not going to have any nails after this whole ordeal.

"here is the paperwork." she handed me a clipboard. i looked from her to the papers then took it. she turned to leave once i did so. i started reading it over.

suicidal watch? 72 hours in here?

"this is crazy." ian said reading over my shoulder.

"i know." i said bluntly.

"what are we going to do?" katt asked, looking up. her face was blotchy and red from crying so hard.

"i-i don't know." i said looking down at the papers once more.

"she's never gotten this bad. not since.." she trailed off and started crying even harder.

"okay, i think we all need to take a deep breath." i said, exhaling long and hard. why do i always have to be the leader? "this is what's happening now, there's nothing we can do to change that."

they all looked up once i said that.

"please, everyone go home and sleep. i'll stay here with her."

"no, george you don't have to stay here alone." max said.

"you all are drunk and tired. take a night to recover and come back tomorrow."

"are you sure? i can stay if you need me to." ian insisted.

"it's fine, seriously. i've got it." did i really?

"if you say so." max said yawning. "see you tomorrow."

"yeah." i said as they all walked away. i took another deep breath and sat next to her bed.

i read through the papers once more and with a click of the pen i started writing things down.

after 10 minutes of paperwork i clicked the pen once more and set the whole assemble on her bed tray.

i sat back down and just looked at her. she looked so peaceful. she looked the way she always does: beautiful.

i looked at her bandages, they were big and white. i don't understand why she did it? i'm still so confused.

i listened to her heart monitor and began to feel drowsy, slowly then falling into a pit of tiredness. my eyelids fell here and there until they completely shut.

why y/n?

why did you do this?

with that being the last thought on my mind, i fell into a deep sleep.

your pov

you woke up to a bright white room. where are you? what time was it? most importantly:

what happened?

you listen to the beeping of some kind of machine as you look around. am i in a?

it can't be. this isn't actually a...

hospital room?

you look to the other side to see joji sleeping, his head leaning against his hand. he looks really tired.

you look down to your wrists. there are two very big bandages on them.

oh god. you didn't actually do it did you?

flashbacks from the incident flood your mind. the feeling of your own blood trickling down your arms, hitting the ground, joji barging in on it.

a tear fell down your cheek as you faced the reality.

"i didn't mean to... i didn't know... i didn't mean to..." you say as the tears fall even harder.

joji perks up at the noise of your voice and immediately gets up.

"hey, hey it's okay, y/n. please don't cry everythings going to be okay." he comforts you in low whispers. you look up from your wrists to him.

"i didn't know what i was doing.. this was all a mistake... i-i-" your breaths becoming staggered. "i don't want to die."

"i know, i know." he comforts you once more.

"oh god... oh god... i'm sorry i'm really, really sorry."

"it's okay don't apologize."

you both sat there in silence trying to find words to say. what do you say to a person in situations like this? after a minute or so you speak up.

"joji?"

"yeah?"

"could you- would you mind- can you come in here with me?" you look up to him once you ask. he hesitates but responds.

"um yeah. yes of course." he nods and you make room. he lowers the bed railing and climbs in, getting under the covers.

you situate yourself so you're now resting your head on his shoulder, hand on his chest with your leg intertwined with his. he rubs your back gently.

"i know we don't really know each other," you begin while wiping a tear. "but i really need this."

"i'm cool with it." he whispers back. "friends can cuddle too." you smile at the comment.

"thank you, joji. if you weren't there tonight i don't know if-"

"we don't have to talk about it." he says. a tear slides down your face remembering the situation.

you listen to his heartbeat and slowly become more tired.

"is it okay if i fall asleep?" you ask. he laughs lightly.

"i thought that's what we were going to do?" you gently slap his face.

"shut up i was just asking."

"then yes, it's okay."

with that, you focus on his heartbeat once more and drift off into a greatly needed sleep.