Broken Promise - BTS Jin x Reader

Chapter 4

I woke up by the smell of stinging rubbing alcohol. I groaned as I felt someone desinfect something on my arm.
After this, the door closed and I felt someone take my hand again. Sobs spread in the room.
Wait, sobs?

I forcefully opened my eyes, only to flinch because of the bright lights. I narrowed my eyes until they got used to the light of the hospital room as I could recognise.
My head ached and throbbed from the pain of hitting it the last night. Also, everything hurt because of the hangover I was still suffering from.
Everything hurt so badly that I just wanted to drift back into this peaceful sleep.
I heard a soft sniffle and turned my head to the source.

There I saw him, Seokjin, sitting next to the bed, his head buried into the sheets of the blanket and his hand tightly gripping mine.

"Seokjin", I whispered because my voice did not want to go any louder.
Yet, he heard it and his head shot up. "Yerin-ah", he breathed out and looked at me with both, concern and relief, in his eyes.

I averted my gaze, feeling ashamed to see him.
Why is he still here?
What the heck did I do to end up in hospital?
Was it perhaps the alcohol?

"My little girl..", he murmured and I could feel him tremble, like he always did when he was crying.
My heart ached to see him like that. Crying. Shaking. Hurting.
All because of me, apparently.

I lifted my hand to wipe away his tears, his eyes following the movement of my hand until they ultimately landed on me again.
"Why have you never told me? I.. I would have helped you. Yerin, I would have done anything," Jin started by I interrupted him by shaking my head.

"Seokjin, it's really hard for me to tell you. You were always smiling around her, you started to replace our memories with memories of her and you. How should I have told you? I didn't want to lose you as my best friend. So I considered it to be better if I hurt by your side than completely alone. I thought you deserved the best only, even if that best is someone I don't stand a chance against."
I felt tears, once again, wanting to excape my eyes but I gulped and looked away to blink away the tears.

"Look at me, Yerin.. Don't look away and don't you ever try to be hurt alone only to spare me a bit of a hard time. Alright?", He spoke as softly as I was used to hearing it and I nodded, yet, feeling a tad hurt and mistreated, like a child.

Just at that moment, a knock on the door became evident, our heads shot up and we both looked towards the door.
"There you are!" Someone exclaimed, making my heart drop and break into pieces again.
Seulgi.

"There you are, baby!" She exclaimed once again and moved towards him, hugging his arm. "I was scared something happened to you last night."
"I'm fine, I was here beside Yerin because she hit her head and fainted."
She looked over at me, disgust in her eyes as well as anger. "I see."

I simply looked at her with no emotions on my face; she would have no idea how to interpret those properly anyway.
"Let's go home now, she's awake. Come on baby, I want to show you something at home. I bought it yesterday," she said and tried to drag him out of the chair. Seokjin painfully looked st me, unsure of what to do.
Don't leave, begged my mind, don't go with her. Stay here with me, at least once. Like you used to do.
"Just one moment" was his answer, breaking my hope again into pieces. My prayers were never heard.
Seulgi nodded and made him get up, pressing her torso tightly up against his arm.
I averted my gaze; it looked disgusting. But mostly, it hurt. It just hurt me to see them like that. Happy.

He doesn't love you. He never did. Get over him already, stupid brain. Leave him alone, go home. You have enough other things to do than hurt yourself by looking at this.

"Just one thing," Seokjin stated and looked at me, an expression on his face which I wasn't quite capable of understanding, "don't do that again. Call me first, okay? I still.. I still care."
And with that, he and his girlfriend who was absent of any grey cells left the room. The room closed, and the desire to drown myself in that bittersweet liquid arose again.

I totally see how you care about me.

**
Hello everyone, I apologise for m6 rare update. It's very difficult to explain why I don't update on a normal basis anymore, but let's say I am fighting some mental health problems at the moment. I don't feel like writing at all, my mind is blank concerning any ideas or inspiration. I am trying my best to still get myself to write a chapter, but I am very well aware of the fact thay the quality of the books decrease.
I am sorry if I continue taking such an enormous amount of time to write the next chapter; I hope you can understand this.
Sincerely,
Steph
**