Story behind the cuts

Chapter 15

I let out a gray laugh as I washed the blood from my ankle,

I let it burn, It felt satisfying,

The noise of running water fogged up my string of thoughts and clarity,

Hung up on top of my head was a bloody towel,

It hasn't been washed since my first time,

I grabbed it causing my blade to fall into the tub,

I tried fishing it out with my hands but it just slit my pointer finger and thumb

Painful at first but I felt a slow de-rise of burning,

I was used to it,

I stared at the dirty mirror in front of me,

It has been a while I thought,

The dark gray hue under my eyes looked like painted circles drawn by a child,

And my hair was a heap in the top of my head left there to rot,

I sizzled as I held the towel around my ankle,

I put my ankle back in the cold water before soaking my whole body in,

My sides hurt from the bruising as I watched my bath turn into a pink,

"Allanah get out. What are you doing in there taking so long?"

Mom was afraid if I was locked up in a room for too long I would kill myself,

She knows I've tried it before,

She's seen my bloody towel,

We don't ever talk about it tho

I splashed my unhurt leg in the water to show her I'm still alive,

Motion was my communication