Always on the Inside

Trying to understand

"Alice, I need you to forget everything about that boy, I know he isn't real, but I need you to forget."

"But what if I don't want to forget!?"

"In that case we need to get rid of all of your sketch books, I can't have you knowing about this stuff. Especially because Jack is way to young to know and so are you. I walk all the way to the outside to buy you that, I can stop buying it." I cant risk loosing that. So I had to just make her think that I was going to forget.

"You can't do that, you know that's the only thing I enjoy doing. I don't like playing piano, or fixing puzzles, or anything else. You know drawing is the only thing I'm good at. Please don't get rid of them." At this point I was sobbing. I looked pathetic, but I was desperate.

"So you will forget about him right?"

"Yes"

"You are dismissed."

I walked down the small hallway to me and Jacks room, every step creaked, our house is almost ancient, if you looked at it from the outside it almost looks abandoned, with all the paint chips falling off, and the broken window in the living room. We would fix it but mom says we don't have the money. Plus the wooden floors are so old that my cat Bonnie makes a noise when she steps on them.

I walk in and jack is on the top bunk of our bunk bed.

"I'm so sorry..." He said as tears roll down his face.

"Why are you sorry, it's not your fault."

 "Well actually it was my fault, because I was looking through your old sketchbook and I dint know what all the pictures meant so I went to ask mom." He started crying even more than he was before. I didn't like seeing him cry. He didn't mean to, he just simply didn't understand.

"It's ok, you didn't know, I'm not mad." It was almost dark and I'm not supposed to let him go to bed after dark because he can only sleep in daylight. So we make sure he goes to sleep before dark, and we make sure he doesn't wake up before its light out. "Umm Jack, I think its time to go to bed."

I tuck him in and I hand him Jegga, his favorite stuffed animal bunny.

"Hhhhhh, I guess I need to be getting to bed too.

My Dream-------

"Good morning beautiful." My eyes flutter open to see him laying in the bed right next to me. His arms are around me and he pulls me closer.

"Hello, what am I doing here?" I loved being in his arms, he gripped the back of my shirt tightly and smiled. I loved his smile.

"Haha, you spent then night with me! Remember?" He smirked. He threw the covers off the bed and got on top of me and started pressing his lips against mine and my neck.

" What are you doing?" he sits back up and smiles.

"I'm kissing you silly!" He goes back to "kissing" me.

So that's what you call it! Kissing.....

"What's your name?" I ask.

He sits up and looks me in the eyes. "My name is Flynn." he stands up and walks out the doorway of the bedroom then peeks back in. "Come and find me."