Maddison Winchester: Journal 7 {Supernatural} (Editing)

The Born-Again Identity

I went for a jog and stopped in an alley behind an old building.

"Crowley!" I yelled, "If you're listening, we need to talk!"

"What do you want, princess?" Crowley said sarcastically as he appeared in front of me, "Out of juice?"

I shook my head, "No, I don't want to do this anymore."

Crowley chuckled, "A little too late for that."

"It's not too late," I said, "I'm not doing this anymore. I don't want to become a monster, and I'm tired of lying to my brothers."

"You're not lying to them. You're just keeping them in the dark because we both know how they would react," Crowley said.

I nodded, "Yeah, that's the problem. Dean would definitely freak out and—"

"That's what Dean does," Crowley rolled his eyes.

"And usually for good reason," I shrugged, "He's pretty spot on when it comes to this type of crap."

"Okay, well let me tell you this," Crowley stepped toward me, "Our deal is not done. The leviathans are still alive."

I shook my head, "I don't care about our deal. I care about letting my brothers down."

"How sweet of you," Crowley said, "How do you feel about letting them die?"

I shook my head, "We don't know that'll happen. We've taken down Lucifer, and we're all still here."

Crowley nodded, "Ah, yes, but if I remember correctly... You, Castiel, Nate, and Bobby all died. Lucifer beat Dean close to death in Sam's body, and then Sam was stuck in the cell with Lucifer for a year before popping back out soulless. Does that about sum it up?" I just stared at him, and he nodded, "I take it by your silence you remember it that way as well. Besides, you're too deep to quit now."

I shook my head, "What? How?"

"You don't want to find out," Crowley said and held out another bottle of blood to me.

Ring! Ring!

I stared at him for a moment, and then answered my phone, "Hello?"

"Where are you?" Dean asked urgently.

"I went for a run," I said, "What's wrong?"

"Sam's in the hospital. We've gotta go," Dean said.

"Okay, yeah, I'm on my way," I said quickly and hung up.

Crowley stepped toward me, grabbed my hand, and put the bottle in it, "Seems like you might need this more than ever, poodle," He smiled and then disappeared.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

A nurse chased after us into Dr. Kadinsky's office, "Okay? You can't just barge in here without an appointment!"

"They said, 'Talk to Kadinsky,'" Dean said and turned to the man sitting behind the desk, "You Kadinsky?"

"You need to be scheduled!" The nurse shouted.

"Then, schedule us!" I yelled back, and she crossed her arms, looking at the doctor for him to back her up.

"He was in a car crash," Dean said to the doctor, "Why the hell can't I see him?"

"You're Sam Smith's family?" Dr. Kadinsky asked.

Dean nodded, "Yeah, what's going on?"

The doctor looked at the nurse, who was still scowling at us, "It— It's fine. Thank you. Really." The nurse glared at us one last time and then walked out, closing the door behind her. He sighed and stood up, "Sam was admitted. He was treated for a broken rib and lacerations."