Head in the Clouds

•Chapter 4•

•••Chapter 4•••

•••Apparently it Gets Worse•••

I drive Cammy home, my thoughts all a blur. What was I going to do? She's going to have to go under the radar, I guess.

But where does that leave me in terms of popularity?

Not that it should matter, but I'm seventeen and obviously it does, at least on some kind of level.

I worked hard to get here, and I can't fall because of somebody else. That's unfair. But it also kind of makes me a bitch, doesn't it?

I pull into Cammy's driveway, and tell her good luck and that she should text me and we'll figure it out later.

I'm pulling out, and my phone vibrates in my pocket. I peek at it; it's my boyfriend. I don't trust myself to read it now while I'm driving, I'm ditzy enough without a distraction.

When I pull into my driveway, I immediately pull my phone back out and read the message from Ryan.

"Hey babe let's meet up this morning ;)"

A smile spreads across my face as I start to type a reply:"sure thang, luv (; name a place? XXX"

He Responds almost immediately with: "mi casa? (Es su casa también)"

I pause for a minute... Why wouldn't we go out on a gorgeous Saturday morning? My stomach is sinking. I hesitantly type "now? I'm available!"

"The time is right ;)."

I pull back out of my driveway and drive up to his house. his car is the only one in the driveway, so I know for sure that his parents aren't home. Normally I'd be so excited; now I'm not so sure. He's been so pushy lately and I don't want to end up in bed with him. Not today, not after what I found out is happening to Cammy.

I can't get pregnant. There's no way. But I guess there is because Cammy is...

Wiping the thoughts out of my mind, I step out and knock on his door. When he opens is, he leans right in for a kiss, and I have to admit I'm more than happy to kiss him back.

Well, I know I tend to get caught up... But unfortunately I'm letting it happen anyways. He picks me up and carries me over to his room, we're kissing, and I don't want to stop. But we're only kissing, right?

No harm, no foul?

A few minutes later and I notice my shirt's gone, and so is his, his fingers are around the straps of my bra, and I'm not too concerned. It happens all the time. But I do get a little worried when I feel him pull off my skirt.

I put my hand on his chest to signal for him to slow down a little. I look him I'm the eyes seriously. "Babe, could we stay like this for now? I mean, I don't want to go too far, not right now."

He looks surprised,"Ashlynn. Now is our chance. I mean, we're mostly there," he mentions, motioning towards my clothes on the ground.

"Ry! I love you too but I'm not up to it right now."

"You can't be not up to it!" His voice is raising a little bit.

"Ryan," I plead. "I'm not. I'm sorry, I don't want to!" That or I'm scared, but I don't tell him that part of it.

"FORGET IT!" He roars, the anger quickly bubbling over. "We're through!!! You won't even let me do this once? God, Ashlynn, what are you a NUN?!?!"

I pull on my skirt and top and Scream back at him. "WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT? YOU KNOW IM NOT! AND FOR YOUR INFORMATION-"

"SAVE IT ASHLYNN! I DON'T EVEN CARE!!!"

"FINE THEN!" I scream back at him, trying to keep bitch mode activated for another minute before I break down. "ALL YKU ARE IS THIRSTY! GET OVER YOURSELF!!!"

I slam his door and run back to my car, start the ignition and forget to take my foot off of the break in the process. The engine dies, and I scream in rage, hot tears already poring down my face. I'm so through with all of this bull.

When my car finally restarts, I speed back down the hill to my house, but what I'm not expecting is the fact that my breaks won't start. Somehow they've completely given out, and I reach for the half-broken parking break in my old car, but it's too late. I'm speeding towards a huge tree and I don't know what to do. All I know is that I'm screaming, and then everything goes black.