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As i walked down the road i was thinking about the events of this day. I took the plane to another town just to have a coffee and now i was back. It was dark outside, logic if you consider it was 2 o' clock in the morning.  I unlocked the door and got straight to my room. I was tired and i just need some rest. I opened my door and found my mom siting on my bed. I was literally socked.

Her eyes were because of crying. I stared for a couple seconds not believing what I was seeing concluding that...... Oh boy, I was in big trouble.

Mom was looking at me too like she was looking to the oddest thing she ever came across in her life. After that she ran to me and hugged me tight. She pushed me so close to her I could barely breath, like she was afraid I was going to leave again.
-Wow, mom. What...
-Oh, sweetheart! I thought i, i thought lost u. I propelled her to the bed and we both sat down.

-Mom why happened ? Why.... Were you crying.

I'm sorry I got into yr room I know it's against yr 'rules' but..... Her voice broke. She swallowed and continued.

I thought i lost you. I thought... with bad happened to you. I called Mary's house. Her mom told me you were with Mary Downtown. Your phone was dead so I called Mary. She told me you were unavailable. I wen5to the bakery and it was there when I found from Ms Hutter who have seen Mary Downtown that you weren't with her. I called her again. This time she was at her house. She and her mother were trying to reach u. Mary admitted she didn't know where you were. They are really worried. After one hour I called the police. I know I promised you freedom but that was way too much and it didn't seemed like Something you would do. I looked for you everywhere hoping you were just daydreaming at a park or something. I find you nowhere I was terrified. Where were you? Why?

I couldn't believe my ears. I have made a mess and I have put Mary into this. What kind of friend am I ? -Wow , mom... I tried to say something but what should I say???? Apologize , defend myself , play the pressured child or should I try to cover it all with lies?

Well, that was impossible. I already felt horrible for what I've done. I just fall into mom's hug holding her tight.

-Sorry . It was the only thing I could say. - I am really sorry mom. She was crying again. I was about to do so but I tried holding it back. Impossible. Mom clear her cheeks  and took a deep breath.

-Can you please tell me why? Reall6i plead you.

-Well, my phone, this ancient thing is obviously facing some problems again. As for me..... I was at .... New Jersey with a new friend of mine. Andrew. Mary knows him. He is a transfer. I went there to, to meet his friends. I am sorry I have no idea I would create such a mess back here. Sorry.

You travel to New Jersey with somebody you barely know and you come back saying you are sorry ejecting me to forget all about it???
Mom was furious.
And you know if it create a mess once you left for another state without telling me. Without telling anybody!!!
Mom, stop...
-I know you are living in a world o-your own but I never thought you are stupid. Turns out you are....

MOM STOP!!!!!!
I yelled.
-Mom I know I have been acting carelessly after dads death and that I created a really messy situation by doing this without your permission. But let me tell ya something girl. After dads death you have been keeping me almost prisoner in this house. Why?Because you were too afraid. You hold me back, into the shadow of this death because you were too scared. I say you are a coward. One day we fight and u decide to let me live more independatly. Samr time a new kid, a very cool kid comes to our school, named Ed. Turns out his dad died too. Simillarity No 1.
Difference: His dad was an author they wrote his last book together. He constantly moves from city to city. But wherever he is he always visit his friends at New Jersey. Otherwise they come to him. We talked and became friends. I know i can be benefited from this friendship. He can teach me how to face that death and live normally without being emotional or angry all the time.

-You know what else? I will tell you smth i havent even admit to myself. I like that boy. And i admire him. I adore him. So when he gives me the oppurtunity to do smth different and forget about my "family drama" for a while I said YES without hesitating. It turned out it was the best thing it ever happened to my life after the last time dad and i hang out. But I don t tell anybody. Nobody at all, not even Mary, creating that way a mess. Which bring us to the question you want to ask the most. Why didn't I told you? The answer is obvious. You wouldn't let me, no matter what and i really needed that trip mom. That slight adventure. So, yes. I am really sorry for that mess. But I don't regret going. I just regret not having it organized better.

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I'm extremely sorry for not having updated for such a long time but I had some technical issues. Anyways. I hope I didn't make you feel too depressed or bored with all that fight again. The next chapters will be a 'clearing out' the situation but things are soon getting better.
Ofc always remember to keep reading.
K.M.