50 Shades of Jonas

Chapter 9: The Flaw In The Plan

Three weeks later I woke up sick to my stomach. I hadn’t been in touch with the Jonas’ since that wonderful night the four of us spent together. All the nostalgia of that night seemed to be too much for me, and I threw up. I had been sick for around a week at that point, and I wondered which of the brothers had given me a cold.

After stumbling out of bed I flipped on my TV and saw a shocking headline: JONAS BROTHERS’ FOUNDATION EXPOSED. The reporter explained the whole story: “Change for Children, a charity started by teen rock stars, the Jonas Brothers, has been shut down for good after two children who had recently been accepted into the program went public against the morals of the foundation,” a picture of the lost boy and lost girl was shown on the screen. “The plan of the charity was to take in children of the world and change them so that their peers would like them better. The young boy and girl who opposed the charity after being enrolled just three weeks ago were quoted as saying: ‘We have a friend who wouldn’t stand for this. He says that it’s always better that u be yourself than being some other person.’ And with sound logic like that, who could support the Jonas Brothers anymore? No comments were made by Kevin Jonas, Joe Jonas, or Nick Jonas. It’s hard to think any parents would let their children be fans of these boys anymore after this scandal. And that’s the way the cookie crumbles.”

I couldn’t believe the story. Maybe the Jonas Brothers weren’t the saints I made them out to be. Nick was so sweet to me, maybe it was an act! Joe was so hot, maybe it was all for show! Kevin said I was pretty, maybe he was a liar! Maybe Frankie was the only decent one of the bunch, and I didn’t even know him! But all of a sudden I threw up again. I was never one to throw up, so I decided it would be good to ask a doctor’s opinion.

“You’re pregnant,” said Dr. van Nostrand. So many different emotions spread over me. “Now, Ms. :D, who is the father? We need to get in touch with him.”

I didn’t have a single answer, I had three. “It’s either Kevin, Joe, or Nick Jonas.” I told him.

“Well, Lauren, it can only be one of them. Which one did you have relations with exactly 22 days ago? We have technology that I swear exists and wasn’t made up for the sake of this story that can tell us the date of conception.”

“22? None of them. It all happened 21 days ago, not 22.”

“Our tests are 100% positive that it’s 22, not 21.”

I knew I needed a friend to talk to about all this information, so when I left the doctor’s office I called up the only person I knew could help me: Deloris. I explained the whole situation to her and she forgave me for our big argument, on the condition that Nick wasn’t the father. I agreed that if Nick ended up being the dad, we couldn’t be friends ever again, but we’d cross that bridge if we ever got there.

We met up so that we could go to the Jonas Manor together and figure out once and for all who the dad was. Deloris knocked on the front door and Nick opened it. Deloris squealed.

“I need to talk to you guys right now.” I said urgently.

“I’m sorry about your charity!” Deloris blurted out.

“Why?” asked Nick, responding to me and ignoring Deloris.

“I’m pregnant.”

Before I knew what was happening I was alone in a room with Kevin, Joe, and Nick. “You’re pretty,” Kevin said.

“Which one of you is the father?” I straight up asked them, not fully expecting a response.

Joe was the first one to speak. “None of us.”

“What!?!?!” There was no way. I was stunned.

“Do you not remember?” Nick started, “that night you fell asleep almost immediately on Kevin’s bed. Only the three of us went at it that night.” Right then I noticed none of them had purity rings on anymore.

“Then who was it?” I asked but I only got silence as a response. Nothing made sense. I stood up and left the boys alone. But then I saw Frankie’s door open, with no one in the room. I was curious, and I snuck in to see what the big secret was. Immediately I saw on his desk the answer. There was a stack of paper cups and next to them a box labeled “GHB.” Suddenly everything made sense.

I ran out of the room to find Deloris, but in the foyer I came across her passed out body, with a plastic cup in her hand. Standing over her was Frankie, and when he saw me he immediately ducked his head and escaped from the scene… the father of my child.

                                                                                    THE END