You Can't Save Me ~Septiplier~

3

I sat on the swing for a little while longer before I started walking home. The entire time, my thoughts were on Jack. Maybe I'm not alone. Maybe he'll be able to save me. Maybe he'll love me. I started to smile to myself. After about a minute, the voices decided to rein their opinion in my head. Why would he ever love you? You're just a mistake. He's only doing this because he feels pity on you. He doesn't care. He'll leave you. Maybe if you weren't so fat, he would actually care. Your face probably hurts his eyes. He would be happy if you died. My happiness dwindled to nothing in just a few moments. They're right. He would be happy if I died.

I stopped walking and looked down at my stomach. It popped out too much for my liking. I need to stop eating so much. I've eaten too much in the last week. I ate an apple on Monday and an orange yesterday. It's only Thursday and I've already eaten this week. I need to stop. I'm too fat. Before I knew it, I made it to my house. I went to the side of the house and looked up at my window. It was on the second story, but we have a lot of footholds on the side of the house.

When I got back inside the house I sat on the edge of my bed. Jack hates you. He's only doing this so he can use you. Why would he like you? You're the most disgusting person to ever live on this planet. Tears were coming out of my eyes. They're right. Jack doesn't like me. I'm disgusting. A freak. A mistake. I got up and walked down the hall to the bathroom. I opened the cabinet and grabbed my razor. I walked back to my room, the razor in my hand. I rolled up my sleeves and pressed the razor to my skin. I sliced and watched as the blood beaded on my arm. I continued to make more cuts, each one deeper than the last. After I ran out of room on my left arm, I moved to my right. When I ran out of room on my right arm, I moved to my thighs. At that point, I was getting very light headed. I had only made a few cuts on my thighs before I passed out from blood loss.

~•~
When I woke up, I saw blood everywhere. My floor was covered in blood, as were my arms, thighs, and clothes. I got up and went to my bathroom so I could get all the blood off me.

When I walked in the bathroom, I looked in the mirror. I looked horrible. My eyes looked dead and lifeless, there were bags under my eyes, and I was unusually pale. I looked away and peeled my bloody clothes off and set them on the floor. I turned the shower on and stepped in. I winced as the water hit my back and the new cuts on my arms and legs. After the initial pain subsided, I cleaned the blood off my body. I got out of the shower and wrapped a towel around my waist. I picked up the clothes I left on the floor and went back to my room to get dressed.

I opened the door to my room and walked in. I went over to my dresser and pulled out a pair of black skinny jeans and a Panic! At The Disco shirt. I ignored the full body mirror on my wall and put my clothes on. After I got dressed, I unplugged my phone and went downstairs. As I was walking down the stairs, I started to hope that they weren't home.

When I got downstairs, I was disappointed because I saw Shane in the kitchen. He saw me and smirked, "Well, the fatty is awake I see." I looked down and walked into the kitchen so I could grab my bag and leave. "Hey! I was talking to you, you ungrateful little faggot!" I looked up at him, "That's right. Now, since we're going to be alone when you get home, I want you home right after school. Got it?" I nodded my head. "Good." He came up to me and slapped really hard before walking into the living room. I sighed and grabbed my stuff before I walked out the door.

While I was walking on the sidewalk, I became more and more afraid. Why did I have to miss yesterday? It's going to be so bad today. What am I gonna do? I was pulled out of my thoughts by the sound of loud high schoolers pushing each other outside of the school. I sighed for the second time that day and went in the building. I walked to my locker, opened it, and grabbed my stuff, and walked to my classroom.