Return to Midgard

Chapter Four

"Loki dear, you haven't been eating again have you? Oh my child, what has happened?" The late queen spoke softly, her eyes saddened, filled with worry as she laid them upon Loki, wondering why he was doing this. With a soft sigh, Frigga sat besides her youngest, hand resting upon his shoulder, though she kept silent, waiting for the prince to answer. The queen wish to understand why Loki would do this, why would he let himself go like such, something must of happened. "Loki, look at me. What has happened?" She asked, eyes scanning his.
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The trickster's eyes slowly opened, as he was brought back to the present, fresh tears streaming down his cheeks as he remember his mother, the one whom meant dearly to him besides his oaf of a brother. Loki still couldn't believe that she was gone, no longer with him, no longer protecting him. Loki wouldn't admit it, but he truly did miss Frigga, missed her so thing words, gentle gestures. Missed how she knew exactly how to help, how to calm him down when he was in a panic, missed her smile, how proud she once was of him. It was painful, thinking of such memories. However, the more he thought about it, the more he wished to join his mother, to feel her hugs once more.
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" I wish not to speak of the sorts" the prince finally spoke, his eyes narrowed and glancing upon the ground, arms around his body as he sat there. He couldn't remember the last time he had a decent meal nor anything at all. "Loki my child, something has brought you into such a state, as your mother is like to know whom did this to my boy" the Queen spoke gently, her voice smoother then the finest asgardian silk, though concern was written all over her features, brows furrowed. "It not of importance, I shall be fine, just need sometime"
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A sigh came from Loki's thin lips, groaning in frustration as he finally got up, dragging himself from the mattress and slipping some attire on, even if they were much to big for him now. As the fallen prince ran his fingertips along his body, feeling what was there, and what was not, he quickly looked away in shame, eyes growing cold. He couldn't do this, not now.
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"Loki Odinson! Do not tell me it is not of importance, look at you child" Frigga said more firmly, shaking her head. "I-it's Thor..he has seemed to have forgotten about me, no longer sees me as a brother nor a friend. I am afraid I have done something wrong, as well his friends had said something. But it's Odin as well" Loki admitted finally, a heavy sigh coming from his lips, fists clenching. "Can I not do anything right? Am I not his son as well? So why does he treat me differently, keeps his distance!"
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Loki shook all thoughts away, finding himself standing upon the empty street, snow falling down slowly, gracefully as he kept his hues upon the street lamp. He hadn't even remember walking out of the doors nonetheless finding his way to the miserable outdoors, but in a way it matched his mood, how he felt and how his soul was. Falling to his knees, Loki slammed his fist against the road, the snow sending a unwanted chill down his spine, eyes watering once more. 'Pathetic' is the one word that repeated itself, the one word Loki could think of to describe himself, and that actions he has done. "I could of done better" he hissed through his teeth, head hung low, hair falling over his eyes.

Loki sat there all night, knees brought up towards his chest, eyes covered by his raven hair, puffy, red, sore. In all of his years the trickster has never cried nor shed a tear as much as he has these past weeks, constantly coming, flowing like a small waterfall upon the mountains. It was embarrassing to say the least, truly pathetic in Loki's mind, yet he did not care whom saw nor did he even bother to do anything at this point. He was lost in his own mind, his demons battling him, depressing thoughts clouding his very well being. Who cares though right? Certainly not Odin nor Thor, surely though his mother, Frigga would of. Loki just couldn't seem to shake off those memories, the ones that truly kept him going all these years, the ones that made him feel loved, wanted. Yet she was gone and so was he, not physically but both emotionally and mentally. Sicken.
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The sun began to rise, hitting the snow at the perfect angle, making it seem like it was glowing. Loki never left the middle of the road, paralyzed in a way, just wanting his suffering to end. Though, as the once god looked up into the sky, hues focused upon the clouds, he could of sworn he saw a sign, saw the late queen, but he shook all those thoughts away knowing that it was his mind playing tricks on him, for it's been days since he has slept last. Sighing heavily, Loki dug his fingertips further into the snow, jaw clenched, eyes cold.
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"Umm sir? D-do you need help up?" A young woman asked nervously, taking a small breath as she waited for the answer. It took a moment for Loki to realize that someone was talking to him, yet along offering help. "I'm fine!" He hissed, glancing up to the brunette, voice harsh, cold. "I-I was j-just asking" she spoke once more, backing away. "You may want to g-get up though" she soon added, arms crossed. "I said I'm fine mortal, now leave me be!" Loki said, shooing the woman away. "I was only trying to help!" The other huffed, shaking her head, turning a heel. Sighing, Loki glanced over at the mortal, scanning her up and down, seeing if she truly meant to help or was only there to mock him, perhaps play a trick. "Loki" he said, holding his hand out. "I'm Ashely" the girl said, taking his hand, helping him to his feet.
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A few long minutes of silence had passed, coffee sitting in front of Loki as Ashley had her own, plus a muffin. Loki didn't know how nor when they got to this cafe, but what he did know was that the warmth was soothing, helped ease his thoughts. "So..why were you in the middle of the road?" She asked, brow raising as she took a sip of her drink. "I'd prefer not to speak of the sorts" he commented, sinking into the chair a little more, eyes focused on the liquid that filled the cup. "Okay" was all Ashely said, shrugging her shoulders. "It's a long story"