Before You

Chapter Three.

I spent the rest of the time there watching the end of the game, and keeping entirely to myself while I ate my new plate of store bought chicken in silence. I was even careful to sit in the floor in front of the coffee table with my back against the couch so that I wouldn't be too tempted to get drawn into Jess and Hunter's conversation again.

When it was time for us to head back home, Hunter offered me his hand to help me up but I shook my head and got up on my own just like I've been doing for nineteen years. I smiled a little though so it wouldn't come off as bitchy. He walked us to the door, holding Jess's hand the whole way and as soon as we were in the breezeway I waved quickly. "Nice to meet you," I told him quickly, "and thanks again for the tickets." I added as I walked away in a hurry. I knew Jess would just assume I was giving them some goodbye privacy, which I was, but I was also just ready to be away from Hunter in general. Something about him makes me feel uneasy. Like my blood won't stop buzzing and my heart is jammed up into my throat every time he'd look at me. It was weird. I also didn't like how he brought up memories of Clint. I loved my brother, but for me, it's much easier to block off those memories than to deal with the pain they come with.

I walked to the car and pulled the handle, only to find that for what was probably the first time in her whole life, Jess had locked her car. I sighed and leaned back against the door, pulling out my phone to scroll aimlessly through my Facebook newsfeed. As soon as I opened the app, I got a new friend request notification. I clicked on it, only to find a picture of a gorgeous guy with a strong jaw, dimpled chin, sandy blonde hair, indigo eyes, and a lopsided grin. My heart beat picked up as I stared at the picture of Hunter Quaid on my phone.

A friend request?

He sent me a Facebook friend request?

I glanced up and saw that he and Jess had moved out to where I could see them now. Hunter and I both looked at each other at the same time and I caught that annoying smile before I had the chance to look away.

"Later, Kit Kat!" He called and I looked back up as he walked back into his apartment and Jessica made an OMG face at me as she tried to walk coolly over to the car.

She beeped the doors and I climbed in and tried to ignore the feeling that we were still being watched.

"I'm dying he is so perfect." Jessica started gushing before her butt was even in her seat. "He's literally so nice, and funny, and god, his freaking face." She bit into her bottom lip. "Did you see his face?" She asked, turning her body to face me.

I couldn't hold back my laughter. "Yes, Jess, I saw his face."

"Freaking beautiful." She groaned, throwing her head back.

I continued to smile at her while she fumbled with her keys and then flew out of the parking spot. She turned up the radio and danced in her seat. Jessica is usually pretty spirited, but it has been a while since I've seen her be so happy. Though she'd never admit it, I know that Garrison really did break her heart when he broke up with her. However, I don't ever push her to talk about it, that only leads to her bringing up Seth.

Even thinking his name in the confines of my own brain is enough to make my stomach feel queasy sometimes. The girls push me to find myself a new boyfriend because it's been so long, but I just can't bring myself to put myself back into a position where I will ever be hurt like that again. I thought I'd had an idea of what heartbreak was, but that was long before the real heartbreak came. There were times I thought I'd never get over it, and even now, I'm not one hundred percent sure if I am, or if I've finally just gotten good enough at pretending that I am that I've convinced everyone else and myself.