LOVESICK

WHAT ONCE WAS

February 13

Today, I don't feel like going to school. I feel terrible about what I did to Anderson. I tell my mom to call the school and tell them I'm sick. And as she and my dad leave to go to work, I get up and I get dressed; I will not be coming home for the rest of the day, or this town. I leave my phone behind. I need to be alone to recover. I though that during the summer being disconnected and only talking to people close to me would help me heal, but I guess it didn't. I'm going to leave for the day and return later tonight, hopefully being alone somewhere where nobody knows me will help.

Anderson-

The hallways are crowded as always, but I don't care, I just want to try and find Daniel, Leslie, and Riley. I wish they had told me where they usually hang out. Yesterday I saw them by the cafeteria so I walk there, and sure enough, I see Leslie and Riley walking out towards me, I wave at them and they smile back, but I'm mostly concerned about where Daniel is. When Leslie and Riley reach me, I ask them.
"Where's Daniel?" Both Leslie and Riley move their shoulders upwards as to say they don't know. "I guess he's just not coming to school today. We tried texting him, but he doesn't answer." Leslie says as she grabs the waffle from her tray and takes a bite. I'm upset that Daniel isn't here. I wanted to talk to him; I like talking to him. But he's not here today, and it's fine I guess, I talk to Leslie and Riley instead, then I walk to algebra with Riley.

In physics class it's the same as yesterday: Jordan is sitting next to me, and he's starting to talk mess about Daniel, and I can't take it. "Jordan," I say annoyed. "Can you just shut the hell up about Daniel already? It sounds like you have a crush on him." And that makes his face go blank. He starts denying it like a little kid, but I ignore him. I don't mind talking about Daniel, but when it's the way Jordan is talking about him: I do mind.
In art class, I'm just waiting for Chad to come up from behind Leslie again, I want to see them talk to eachother after having only stared at eachother from across the room for so long, and I can tell Leslie wants him to get here soon as well; she keeps shaking her leg and trying not to look at the door to be surprised. When Chad finally comes, I give him a thumbs up and he stands in front of Leslie.
"Hey, Leslie." He says.
"Hi." Leslie says nervously.
"So, I heard that you tend to stare at me from across the room a lot, and I found it funny because I always do the same thing to you." She starts to blush. "Yeah. It sounds about right."
"And I think you're really cool... and I was wondering if you wanted to go out tonight to the cafe with me?" Say yes! Say yes!
Leslie is silent for a moment, then she nods her head. "Sure! After school?" She asks. "Great. I'll see you then." Chad says as and he walks away giving me a thumbs up. I look over to Leslie and I see she's turning very red. "Are you okay?" I ask her.
"I'm fine," She says waving her hand at me. "Just very happy." And I'm glad she's happy. The whole thing went different than what I expected to happen, but I'm glad it did. I'm still wondering where Daniel is, and I think Leslie notices it because she looks at me like I have something on my face. "What's wrong with you?" She asks me. "Nothing, I'm just... I'm just really worried about what happened to Daniel. Where is he?" I ask, filled with wonder.
"You sound a lot more concerned about him than Riley and I," She laughs. "It's almost like you-" Leslie stops before finishing her sentence, and I look up at her, she looks shocked. "No way," She says astounded. "You like Daniel?" She whispers to me, and now I start to blush. "I- I do." I whisper to her, and she looks like she's about to cry. "But... I thought you had a girlfriend?" She asks me. "Yeah. I had a girlfriend a while back, but my last relationship was with a guy... I'm bisexual."
Leslie starts fanning herself with her hands. "Oh my god. Anderson, you have no idea about... oh my God, Daniel has had a crush on you too, he was starting to accept the fact that you two will only be friends but... this changes everything! I'm so happy for you." She leans over and hugs me, but I'm still confused as to where Daniel is. "Don't worry about Daniel. He's done this before. He tells his parents to call and say he's sick and he just disappears for the day. Me and Riley go on with our lives just like everybody else. He uses this time to focus on himself and on how to be a better person... wait... so your parents know that you like guys too?" She asks, changing the subject. "Uh... yeah?" I respond as if it's a shocker.
"Wow," She says, fascinated and I'm not sure why.
"Because Daniel's parents don't support him for being gay, they think he'll grow out of it in the future which is why they still let him live with them." I feel my heart break at that. No wonder Daniel feels the need to disappear: its people like his parents and Jordan who are making him feel like he's not right. But he is, he's perfect in every single way.
"So you're sure he'll come back?" I ask to be assured.
"Yeah. At night. He probably took the train so, he might be here at... nine?" I nod my head and I remember we need to be doing our art pieces. Leslie and I get up to get ours. I grab another sheet of paper and she grabs her clay piece and we start creating.