confusion? // sf & bw

ch 19//life

it's been 2 months after what brandon did, he's with that bitch ariana ugh but i'm over him tho. i've gotten closer to steven tho, tbh i think i have real feelings for him. i sometimes hate my life, i over think too much. i was listening to sad songs while texting laritza since she was trying to make me happy, i fell asleep with my earphones on.

i woke up the next day, i wasn't really feeling it no more. i don't wanna be happy again, i don't think i'll ever be happy tbfh. i stayed in bed all day because i'm just a useless girl. i've been cutting myself lately, idek why. i have this feeling that nobody actually care about me. but the only person who does is steven, gio, and laritza. i posted this sad edit on instagram and people commented ' LIZ WHATS WRONG ' i didn't wanna answer cause that would be stupid. i'm just tired of getting hurt, i wasn't supposed to be here. years ago, my dad tried killing me while i was in my moms stomach. i never talked about it because it brings me down. i wish my dad did killed me.

few hours of cutting and thinking, i get a text from steven to meet him by the corner. i put on stevens hoodie, slipped on some ripped jeans, & some black and white vans. i told my mom that i was going for a run. i headed out the door, and saw steven at the corner already. he had a big smile on his face while i had a weak smile on mine. " hey liz, how you been? " he gave me a weak smile. " uh why did you tell me to meet you here " i avoided his question, i don't wanna tell him i've been cutting myself. " i just wanna see my sis, it's been 3 days since i haven't seen you " i looked at him and said " oh " i walked away but steven grabbed my arm and kissed me. i had the butterflies, i was happy.

( A/N POV ; just imagine you were in a bad mood but steven told you to meet him at the corner and you guys talk for few mins and you walked away but he stops you and kiss you )

" thanks " i pulled away and steven made a frowny face. i soon get a text from my mom saying that she's leaving to work. i asked steven if he wanted to come and he said sure. we walked to my house which was like 2 mins away, i walked him to my room it was messy. i asked steven why he kissed me, " why did you do that? " i looked into his beautiful brown eyes, they were easy to get lost in. " did what? " he gave me a sarcastic look, he's so stupid i swear. " why you grab me & ki - ki - kiss me? " i was stuttering so much to the point that i was blushing so hard. " i can't kiss my sister ? is that a problem ? " he gave me smirk which made me blush even more. " yes it's a problem because we aren't related " i didn't wanna smile because it didn't feel right to smile atm. " that doesn't mean anything " he gave me a wink, i covered my face because i knew i was red as a tomato. he lift up my head and pecked my lip, i really like steven but he's putting me in the brother zone. i wish i could tell him how i feel but i couldn't because he doesn't feel the same way.

it was currently 12 in the morning, i woke up next to steven. it was still dark & i completely forgot that steven was still here. i went downstairs to get a drink of water because my throats was dry, i went back up stairs and steven was awake. " babe why are you up " he rubs his eyes ahhh he's so cute. " i was getting water, go back to sleep. sorry for waking you up behbeh " i was kinda blushing because i called him ' beh ' hehe. " i woke up because you weren't beside my side, come here " he pulled me into a kiss , i kissed back, & he told me everything will be alright which made me feel better. i wish steven felt the same way i do, tbh i never really liked brandon. i knew he would be a f - boy.

S T E V E N S P O V

i can't believe liz called me ' beh ' i was blushing but she didn't look. i'm glad she got over brandon, me and brandon haven't been talking because of what he did to liz. i like liz a lot, i wanna call her mine but she doesn't feel the same way. i guess i'm sibling zonzed, even tho i don't know if she feels the same way, i'll always be by her side.

it was now 3 in the morning, liz is sleeping by my side while i was on my phone. i couldn't sleep, i just kept thinking about the kiss me and liz had. i kissed her lips which made her smile, i whispered in her ears that i love her. if any boy touches her in any type of way, i'm really gonna hurt them. i went on instagram for a little, i went to see who has a request to follow me, i then saw see ariana trying to follow me. i declined it and blocked her, i really don't like ariana, she used to like me in 4th grade. it was 3:30, i was getting tired so i fell asleep on liz stomach.

i woke up and checked the time, it was 10 in the morning. Liz was still asleep, she's so adorable when she's a asleep. i took a picture of her and posted it on sc, my caption was " haha, my behbeh still asleep 💙 ". Amaris replied to my snap and said " ouuuuuu i see you bro 👀 " i only told amaris how i feel about liz. i get a text from my mom that she wants me home, i woke up liz and told her i'm leaving. i gave her a peck on the lips and told her i love her, she gave me a frowny face and said " don't leave me behbeh " i told her i would be back, she walked me downstairs and i opened my arms which singled liz to hug me.

liz always gives me this type of feeling, i really really like liz. tomorrow, i'm gonna ask her if she wants to go to the movies with me, just the two of us * wink wink * .