VALOR

Part 7

Valerie finishes reading the letter and cries. She tries to collect herself as she applies her makeup, but her hand is shaking. She puts on a black dress and checks her hair before grabbing her purse.

When she arrives at the funeral, she immediately hugs Arcadia, who she has grown close to over the past four years.

Though Valerie and AJ were never married, she and Arcadia accept the folded flag together. Valerie tries her best to remain stolid through Arcadia's tears. They take the flag together, but Valerie lets Arcadia keep it.

"Mommy?"

Valerie turns to face her son. He is only two and a half. He is smart for his age, but he is still too young to understand what has happened.

"Mommy, why is everyone so sad?"

Valerie tries to hold back tears. "Because someone we all love is gone, and can't come back."

"What was his name?"

"Aaron Parker."

"Hey, my name's Parker!"

Valerie smiled through her tears, now pouring. She was glad she hadn't worn any makeup to smear. "Uh-huh. That's right kiddo."

"Well, I promise I won't leave you like that Parker did."

"He was a good guy, kiddo. He didn't want to leave."

"But he did."

"Look, kiddo. Everyone has to eventually. We can't all stay on the planet forever. We're all sad because we think he should have been on the planet longer."

"I don't get it, mommy. Is he in space? Why did he leave?"

Valerie sighed. "When you're out in the garden, picking flowers for Mommy, which flowers do you take?"

"The pretty ones, to give to you!"

"Exactly. Whichever person decided these things thought that AJ was going to be a pretty flower for someone else's bouquet. He was a good guy, kiddo. All your father ever cared about was doing good things for other people."

"Wait... my father?"

Valerie sighed. She had hoped that AJ would leave service and Parker would get to meet his father someday. Now she regretted never telling AJ he had a son. "Yeah, he is. Maybe that's a story I'll tell you someday. Maybe it's a story I should have told AJ before he... before he died. Your dad valued duty, honor and valor. And I think that the valor lies in the fact that he wanted to help people so much, that he was willing to do this. I just wish he would have gotten to meet you. You're so much like him."

"You know what I think?"

"What do you think, kiddo?"

"I think that if he was a lot like me, he must've been pretty alright."

Valerie lets out a short laugh. "Yeah, kiddo. He was."

The funeral attendees each go up to a man in uniform to take a flower to lay upon AJ's grave. When it is Valerie's turn, she takes two and hands one to Parker. She places hers on the coffin, and holds Parker up so he can reach. "Go on," she nudges.

Parker puts his rose with the others. As Valerie looks at the tombstone. She then kisses her fingertips and lays them on the tombstone.

"Mommy," says Parker.

"Yes?"

"What does the writing on the stone say?"

Valerie took a breath. "Aaron J. Parker. Duty, Honor, Valor."

When Valerie gets home, she makes Parker a snack and sits down at her desk to write.

Dear AJ,

I went to your funeral today. I heard there weren't enough pieces for an open-coffin visitation, but I don't know that I would have kept myself together if there had been.

I wish I had told you so many things.

That I regret pursuing my arts career too early. I should have spent my high school years with you instead of at rehearsals and trade shows and expos.

That that weekend you spent stateside a few years ago had resulted in a child.

That that child has your eyes.

That the best moments of my life so far have been the ones I've spent with you and the ones I've spent with Parker.

That Parker is not only named after you, but after your mom. She is an incredibly strong woman.

That I love you.

That I love you.

That I love you.

I hope you are some place better than here, where you will finally be satisfied.

I love you,

Valerie.