chapter OO: everything i didn't say [the repercussion]

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DECEMBER 20, 2014

1:03 am

R: You just left the hospital today, and you brought all the words I didn't have the courage to say with you.

1:14 am

R: I'm sorry, even though I shouldn't have anything to be sorry for. You're an asshole. I have to keep repeating it in my head to remember it's true. I'm sorry I ignored you and I'm sorry that we're like strangers again. For so long I thought about what I would do or say if I ever ran into you again but nothing could have prepared me for yesterday.

1:30 am

R: Is it weird that I don't want to see you again but I do? My chest closes up again when I think about that being the last time we ever meet. It's ironic that you hurt me and I still want you. It's stupid and irrational but I guess love (I fucking hate that word) or whatever the hell this is, turns you into a masochist.

1:43 am

R: I hate you but I don't and I hate it and I'm crying and I am so fucking glad these messages don't fucking deliver.

R: Screw you, Calum Hood. You fucking ruined me.

Message undelivered, this number is no longer in service.

DECEMBER 20, 2014

4:16 am

C: I'm on the plane to head back to the tour and I can't sleep, and it's all because of you.

C: I guess I can't hate you for blaming me. Hell, I already blame myself. But god, you're so damn gorgeous and seeing you in person made all the feelings come rushing back. All the memories I could never seem to escape. Your eyes are the same as I remembered them always being.

4:20 am

C: You could barely look at me. That hurt. It hurt even more when you kept running and avoiding me,  but I'd run away from myself too if I could. I'm sorry.

4:23 am

C: It's kinda surreal, seeing you after thinking about you for so fucking long. You've changed, I can tell. Because of me, I'm not sure, but you're rougher now, sharper. Cold. You have every right to be.

4:47 am

C: I'm sorry I keep leaving and taking from you until there's nothing left.

Message undelivered, this number is no longer in service.

DECEMBER 21, 2014

11:53 am

R: Apparently a bottle of Jack Daniels before bed heightens the pain instead of dulling it. Duly noted.

R: New Years Resolution is to never text this number again. I'm done with this.

Message undelivered, this number is no longer in service.

FEBRUARY 25, 2015

11:47 pm

C: Played the last show of our pre-tour for the Rock Out With Your Socks Out Tour in Tokyo today. I know you would fucking love it, everyone is so nice and there's so much to see.

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⏰ Last updated: Jan 04, 2017 ⏰

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