The Distance Between Two Hearts

chapter 3

*                           *                         *
      "But why wasn't he gonna be at lunch?" I asked Lily. "Dont you think its strange."
       "Em, you're beyond stressing, about this guy you barley know. You might think he's totally hot but-"
       "I don't think he's totally hot.." i said, with widened eyes.
       "Emma, this guy has been the only thing on your mind since he got here! Face it, he makes you forget you're shy." She argued, followed by a drink of water from the fountain.
     "I guess you're right," i confessed, "maybe he does, but he's not the only thing on my mind, that college is too."
     "Trying to figure out how to keep up with the love of your life!" She giggled.
       "Hush Lily!" I laughed, nudging her. "See you at lunch?" I asked before entering my Algebra II class. I was a senior in Algebra II!
     Told you i had "boom boom" classes. That made me in Geometry last year, while everyone else was in Algebra II and even pre-calculus! I felt below most of my friends.
     "Most definitely, see you at lunch." She smiled, walking away and catching up with a few of her other friends, Lauren and Riley.
     Riley was one of the smartest girls in school, and even though she had a boys name, her curvy figure complimented her beautifully, along with her green eyes and long brunette hair. 
       I sometimes wished i was as bubbly as Lily, or as beautiful as Riley. Or as creative as Lauren. Lauren was into everything i was, except i seemed to be an amateur, while she was pro. Painting was my passion, yet she was better at it then me.

     I zoned out in class as i usually did, sketching a girl in a winter coat and a fluffy scarf. Since it was around christmas time.
     I suddenly got a vibration from the bag on my lap, checking it, it was a 513 area code.
    513? That was Cincinnati. Wasn't it?
     "Hey stranger :)"
     "Jeremiah?" I suddenly recalled, he had said he used to live in ohio before he moved to North Carolina.
      "Well i would hope that you're not too freaked out about how i got your number."
    "Right :p" I answered. "So why aren't you gonna be at lunch?" I asked.
     "Im swamped with meetings about the new school. :( i just wanted to see how you were doing, make sure you save my number ;)"
     "I will! :*"
      In that moment, i froze. I sent a kissy face emoji! We're definitely not on that level yet!
     "*** :), sorry, typo" I lied, playing it cool.
     "I assumed :p" He replied.
     'Thank goodness.' I thought.

    "Emma!" Yelled Mr. Freeman.
I froze in my tracks. I was busted, totally busted for being on my phone during class.
     "Mr. Freeman, im sorry it wont happen again." I said, shoving my phone in my bad and feeling pure and utter humiliation.
     "What?" He replied, "I just wanted to speak with you after class about the new student. You know our school policy is always make a new student feel at home." He announced.
     "Right.." i nervously giggled, "I'll definitely speak with you after class.."
     "Great," he said, turning around as he continued writing on the board, "but while we're on the topic," he said, "Make sure you're texting in class doesnt happen again." He smiled.
      "Never again.." I muttered nervously. Swallowing and watching people stare at me.

                      *Ring*

    "You wanted to see me?" I asked.
     "Yes," he started, looking down at a few of his papers. "So Mr.Walker is obviously behind on a lot of work, i was wondering if you'd like to stay after school on Tuesdays and Thursdays to help him catch up a bit." He said, taking a sip of his horrendously black coffee.

     "Uhmm.." i was thinking oh-so much about this. "I'd love to!" I gushed. Annnnddd..the thinking stopped. Of course i wanted to spend time with Jeremiah, i just hoped that i wouldn't be embarrassing myself in front of him, and i hoped that i didn't actually choke on my words.
      "Great! I'll be sure to add some extra credit points." Said Mr. Freeman.
     
     Score! Extra credit points, and some time with a very handsome boy.
     "Hide the drawings." I whispered to myself. "Hide the stupid drawings, and you'll be fine."

                   *At lunch*
  
      "So I know you kinda hate parties," Lily said. The second she mentioned party i instantly had a bad feeling about all this.. "but there's gonna be a huge party at Rileys house tonight and she said i could invite a friend." She smiled at me nervously, her perfect light brown eyebrows raised.

     "Lil," I explained, taking a huge bite of my cheeseburger. "When she said invite a friend, she most certainly wasn't talking about a quiet weirdo like me." Sipping on my apple juice, i began choking when she said,
    "You're not weird, T even said so." She smiled, pretty pleased with herself, carefully picking up her hotdog, making sure she didnt get ketchup in her long pink nails.

     "And what the hell does T matter to me?" I asked. "I'd rather not deal with boys right now." I explained, wiping my mouth of the apple juice i spewed out from that fiasco.

     "You totally contradicted yourself!" She laughed at my hypocrisy. "You have a soft spot for Jeremiah!"

     "Shhhh!" I gestured for her to not speak so loud. "I barely know the guy. And anyway," I said, trying to defend myself, "I'd rather become best friends with him then fall in love."

      "I'll never understand why you refuse to love anyone." She wiped her ketchup-filled mouth "You were with Jason for 2 years and never said the 'L' word."

     She was right. Jason was my ex-boyfriend. I was with him Freshman, and sophomore year and what Lily doesn't know is that i did say i loved him. But looking back on the relationship, i wish i never did say i loved him. Im ashamed i ever gave him that word. He was creative like me, except in a different way. He wrote songs, which i admired. But that was the only thing.
     The kid went nuts. And manipulated me. He changed my thought process and made me depressed. Why did i give this person two years of my life? I guess thats something I'll never know. But what i do know is that I'll probably never love anyone again. It would probably take a special person for that. Very special. As much as i liked Jeremiah, i didnt wanna admit it, nor did i wanna love him.

      "Yeah, i guess i won't understand it either." I smiled. Covering my feelings the way i always did. And i did it well.
     I will never hate anyone, except Jason, for everything he caused me.

*                          *                            *
    
      As i walked home from school, my mind raced with multiple thoughts.
    Several thoughts of Jeremiah. His blue eyes and brown shaggy hair. Actually his eyes were like a greyish. Regardless they were mesmerizing.
     And also some bad thoughts. A bad, toxic relationship i couldnt understand, even though it happened years ago. Or it seemed.
  
     I also had a fairly short relationship after Jason during junior year with a guy named David. But that only lasted like two weeks, so i don't like to count it. I dont even think he was into me, i think he felt bad for me.

      Is that just me?

      "Hello Emma, how was school?" Asked Seth, as i walked through the door, setting my pink school bag on the table. It was pink and army fatigue that i got last christmas.
      "Same old same old." I answered.

     "Interesting." He said sarcastically. "Well Bethany went out to pick up a few things for dinner, i just wanted to make sure you walked home okay."
      "Thanks." I said plainly, "I'll be in my room."
      I grabbed my paint supplies, and began doing what i do best.

      Thats sure as hell to get my mind off of all this crap..