Summer Escape

Food for Thought

It's been about a week since Jack and I's date. I'm just so afraid. Jack reminds me nothing of Josh, yet every time I want to let my guard down, I'm bombarded by those stupid flashbacks. I feel like maybe if I keep my distance, it'll just be better for the both of us.

"So, should I just put you in a bubble now?" Danielle asks, scooping cereal into her mouth. I roll my eyes in response.

"Oh and the silent treatment. Wow what ever will I do." Danielle's sarcasm is always at an all time high in the morning.

"I'm sorry," I groan, "it's just I feel so.....trapped with these thoughts. And it's just easier to keep Jack at a distance."

"I think you should tell him the truth." I look at Danielle as if she's said the most absurd thing ever.

"Are you insane?! He'd either go running for the hills or maybe he'd be just as crazy as Josh!"

"How many times have I tried to tell you that not every guy out there is a psychopath and you can't live your life in fear."

I nodded my head. I'm still not entirely convinced that telling him is the right thing to do, but it's not fair to keep him at a distance when it's not his fault. I pick up my phone and decide to text him.

To Jack: You wanna get some coffee later?

The response was almost instantaneous.

From Jack: I'd love to! 2 sound good?

To Jack: Perfect :)

I went to get a shower and hopefully wash off some of the worry. I stood under the hot water and let it soak in and relax my pores. I tried to clear my head, I never liked to let my mind wander because where it ended up was never good.

Once I was done I got dressed and brushed through my tangled hair. I rushed through the rest of my routine because Danielle was eager to get ready as well. I grabbed my wallet and phone before leaving the apartment and heading down to the coffee shop. I trailed down the sidewalk, passing by groups of people and a strip of shops along the way. After a block and a half I reached our usual coffee shop, at this time of day though it's always a little more vacant. I pushed open the door which signaled the bell and a warm smile from the cashier. I scanned the booths and tables before my eyes were met with Jack's, over in a booth by the window. Once he saw me he raised his hand to wave which I mirrored, then walked over to him.

"I uh waited to order til you got here." He stated.

"Aw you didn't have to do that."

"No it's okay," he paused before speaking again, "so uh, what do you want?"

"Jack, I can get up and order myself." I laughed a little.

"Well I mean I know, but," he trailed off.

"A cappuccino. I'll have a cappuccino." I said smiling, which he returned and got up to order.

I waited quietly, twiddling my thumbs until a cup was placed in front of me. Jack slid in across from me and took a sip of his drink then spoke.

"So I'm glad you asked me to get coffee." He glanced up at me and then back at his beverage.

"Really? And why is that?" I asked before taking a sip.

"Well I mean, it's been a week since our date and I was afraid I'd scared you off." He gave a half hearted chuckle.

"No no. I um," I struggled to find a way to explain, "it was just nerves that's all."

He nodded, even though he didn't seem entirely convinced.

"So, since you learned stuff about me the other night, it's my turn to ask the questions." A smirk grew onto his face which gained a groan from me.  "No no, you can't get out of this one."

"Fine," I rolled my eyes, "ask your questions."

A devilish grin grew on his face before opening his mouth again, "alright we'll start you off easy. Where are you from?"

"I'm uh from Georgia." I stated.

"Ah a peach huh?" I giggled at his attempt of a joke.

"Alright next question ya dork."

"Okay um siblings?"

"Uh no, only child. Both of my parents are back in Georgia."

"Hmm interesting, never would've pegged you as an only child." He furrowed his eyebrows.

"Why do you say that?" I ask.

"I don't know. You just seem like someone who would get along well with others and I would've guessed you had a brother by your tough demeanor."

"Alright Mr. Psychologist, if you're done analyzing me let's get to the next question." He chuckled which revealed a small dimple on his right cheek.

"Alright uh, where'd you go to college?" Suddenly my smile faded and I could feel my heart rate increase. Alright calm down, just answer his question. He didn't ask about college, he just wants to know where you went. It's going to be okay, just answer.

"I uh, went to the University of Georgia." I hesitated to get it out.

"Oh nice. Did you like it?" Did I like it? I don't know does anyone like being pursued by a psychopath?

"Um yeah it was great. Great school." I forced out.

"What'd you studying?"

"Is it possible for us to talk about something other than college?" I tried to say as nicely as possible. Jack just nodded and didn't pry further. He asked me a series of questions ranging from my interests to parts of my life, nothing too deep but each revealing something new about myself. I was on a roll until suddenly he asked me something I wasn't expecting.

"So do you like me?" He blurted out.

"Wha- what?" I suddenly felt so exposed, a feeling that felt all too familiar.

"I know it's random and maybe a little forward, but do you?" He asked, anticipation in his eyes.  I got this feeling in the pit of my stomach, the same one I felt all those years ago on Josh and I's first date. I paused and thought about what to say but then I thought, why am I doing this. Why do I keep letting my thoughts consume me? For the first time since the incident, I decided not to let these flashbacks ruin my life. I'm not going to let him win any longer.

"Yes. I do."