It's a Struggle Being Infatuated With Someone You Have an Urge To Murder.

The Urge.

"What happened to your head?" Was the first thing Dan had asked me when we met up.

"My mother hit me with her wine bottle, nothing serious." I muttered looking down.

"Oh?" Jane breathed out flabbergasted, Dan sporting the same expression.

"Oh my God you should've see your guys' faces" I said bursting out laughing, I know I have a twisted sense of humor but it's how I seem to cope with my horrific situations.

"Don't joke like that man." Dan said as he hit me on the shoulder, sounding genuinely worried.

"Get used to it cause there's plenty more where that came from." I chuckled.

"Don't even joke like that around me or I will end you." Jane grumbled as she glared my way. 

"Geez ok, tough crowd." I said awkwardly as I rubbed the back of my neck.

"She just has it bad at home don't take it personally." Dan whispered to me.

Not uttering another word we kept walking towards our destination, during the walk I started to feel light headed and my urges started returning.

~ ~ ~

"Isn't this fun?!" Jane shouted over the loud music immediately pulling me to the center of the crowd. Everyone was either making out with a stranger or grinding against a stranger not really my style of getting with a person if you ask me, I find it better to be subtle but alluring.

As we danced Jane decided it was a good idea to smash her lips against mine, my initial reaction was to push her away since I'm not really into the female species. "Whats the hold up?" Jane pouted, not really offended that I pushed her way. 

"Well, you're drunk and I'm gay." I chuckled, removing her arms from around my neck I go sit by the bar, maybe someone could buy me a drink.

 (A/N at first I wrote fat instead of gay by mistake lmao -it's fine I'm fat I can say that-)

As I predicted, a handsome man who was probably around thirty years old sat next to me, ordering two shots of tequila.

"Why is such a handsome young man like you sitting alone?" he asked as he got all up close grabbing my hips, his mouth hovering beside my ear.

"Well I don't know I guess you'll just have to find out." I whispered seductively.

"Hm, wanna come over to my place?" He hummed pressing our chests together.

"How about my place? Just let me tell my friends... you should do the same and make sure to tell them that you're leaving alone, I'm under age." I told him hotly as I pointed towards a group of people who were clearly trying to get a glimpse of what was happening. 

Pecking him on the lips and making sure to sway my hips when I left I went to tell Jane that I wasn't feeling good and that I was taking a cab home. She offered to leave with me but obviously I had to dismiss that suggestion as I had someone waiting for me outside.

~ ~ ~

Once we had done it  in my basement the guy immediately passed out, I'm guessing it was his first time, at least with a guy?

You see this isn't the first time I brought home an older guy, older lady if I was desperate. Feeling my hands start to tremble I realized the urge was becoming stronger.

Quickly putting my clothes back on I open the door of the other room inside the basement. This is were all the magic happens. Grabbing my gloves, plastic apron and goggles I make sure they're on tight. Grabbing my baseball bat I always have prepared for when my lucky guests come over I go back to where my one night stand was snoring away. As I straddle his hips I ready my arms and lock them, and 'SHUCK' went his skull as my bat struck against his head. Checking for his pulse, it had evidently slowed down which meant he was knocked out.

Perfect.

I grab the guy by his ankles and pull him off of my mattress dragging him into the other room. Once I set him atop the operating table I rip open a sachet to reveal a fresh scalpel, pulling it out I start to incise the guys  abdomen and lets just say I that didn't stop there.

~ ~ ~

"If you keep this between you and me that would be great.", I hissed as I pulled the guy by his shirt,vigorously shoving him back.

Once he handed me the money which was a thousand nine hundred and nineteen grand I handed him the organs which were safely put into a crate and  preserved in several 'containers' made specifically for each and every organ.

As he immediately claimed the crate he hurriedly scurried away not looking suspicious at all, note the sarcasm. Just as I was walking down the alley way my phone starts to vibrate, pulling it out of my pocket I see that Jane's calling. Pressing the answer button she instantly started bombarding me with questions, asking me if I was okay.

Trying to relieve her from her stressed state, I keep reassuring her that I'm fine and that I'm just not too fond of crowds.

It's odd how she's become so attached to me from a friend perspective as we've only known each other for a few weeks give or take. As much as I'd like to admit it, it feels quite reassuring having someone like that in your life. 

Anyways, after the call I headed straight home to where I was greeted by my mother sobbing on the couch. If I'm going to be honest here I do feel somewhat bad for her I know, how confounding that a murderer like me has feelings and actually feels bad for someone. Feel free to gasp.

Unwittingly my feet dragged me across the room over to where my mother was sobbing, the moment I sat down my mum lifted her face from her now damp, hands looking up at me with confusion plastered all over her face and also some mascara running down her face.

"What are you looking at?" She grumbled, her brows -or what's left of them- furrowed and her cheeks apple red clearly embarrassed she's been seen like this.

"Why?" Is all that I had managed to entreat.

"Why what? Use your words I'm not a psychic." She replied crudely.

"Why did you ruin this family? What urged to start drinking? What makes you act like such an asshole to your own husband and child? What's your objective here, did you intentionally make dads mental sickness worse than it already was? To ruin my childhood? " I questioned, my voice becoming louder by every question.

"Have you ever thought that maybe your own mother is going through shit too, or are you just too consumed in yourself and your problems?!" She angrily shouted, and again trying to act like she's the victim.

"It's kind of hard to think about your problems when you constantly abuse me! How dare you even try to shift the blame onto me when you're clearly the problem here? Honestly that's really pathetic and to think that I actually came to comfort you, how stupid of me." I scoffed, lifting myself off of the sofa I was about to head back into my room until I hear my mother mutter, "I've been trying to stop d-drinking." She sniffled at the end, I have my assumptions that she might have bi-polar disorder honestly.

"What do you want me to tell you?" I huffed crossing my arms.

"I want your support." 

How priceless.

"You might get it if you go a week without drinking, if you could manage." I replied doubt evident in my tone.

"Deal." She muttered to herself quietly.

That's how my day ended, how odd.