THE GREATEST BOOK OUT THERE: AUSMERICA ONESHOTS

Horror movie disaster 🐍

PERSON A HATES HORROR MOVIES AND PERSON B MAKES THEM WATCH ONE

“KYLE, FUCK NO! I AM NOT WATCHING FUCKING KRAMPUS WITH YOU! YOU WILL NOT RUIN MY FAVORITE HOLIDAY WITH THAT MOVIE OF EVILNESS!” Alfred screeched at his boyfriend who was trying to get him to watch the horror movie, Krampus. The American hated horror movies with a passion and pretty much the only way to get him to watch one was to trick him into it. “But Krampus is a real Christmas movie! Pleeaaasssee!” Kyle begged and made his best puppy dog eyes. “ I will be right next to you the whole time!” Alfred turned away, trying his best to resist the puppy dog eyes Kyle was now sporting. “No! You know how I feel about horror movies!” Even though he hated horror movies, he loved horror games, which, in Kyle’s eyes, made him a complete hypocrite. “B-But Alfie-” Kyle whimpered, trying to make his accent stand out more, “ Alfie please? I really wanna watch it….” He buried his face in Alfred's shoulder. Alfred let out a strained noise at Kyle trying to use his accent to win him over. If the Aussie wanted to play the accent card, he’d fully well play it back using his deep southern accent. “Well darlin’, I don’t wanna. Now you and ya’re sweet pea face can watch it yerself!” He said with a smirk, knowing that his accent also had quite the effect on the Australian. It was at that moment, Kyle knew, he fucked up.  He didn't think Alfred would have caught onto what the Australian was playing at and used it to his own advantage. Kyle took a soft breath before whining more, ” Now come on, Alfie, we can watch it together and have fun!” “No. I ain’t dealin’ with that shit, so ya can go fuck yerself.” Alfred said stubbornly, he just wouldn’t budge when it came to horror movies. Kyle smirked, knowing how to turn the Americans words against him, “But Alfred, I already have you to do that~” Alfred blinked, processing his boyfriend’s words before shoving him away with a very red face. “PERVERT!!” He screeched out and turned around to march away back to their shared room. Kyle laughed and grabbed Alfred into a hug before the American could get too far away, “Aww Alfred! I was just teasing! No need to get salty, that's Arthur's job.” Alfred turned his head towards Kyle’s and narrowed his eyes as his nose scrunched up. “Too bad, you know I get salty when you act perverted out of nowhere like that!” He said, his freckles getting more apparent the redder his face got. Kyle grinned and hugged him tighter, “You are just too cute! But anyways, I'm not going to let you go until you agree to watch the movie with me. “ Alfred looked unamused. “Fine, I hope you’re okay with bein’ dragged around the house for the rest of the week.” Kyle made a determined face and hugged Alfred tighter, “You will have to agree to watch it sometime, You can't just go around for the rest of your life with me clinging to you.” The Aussie rested his head on Alfred's head and got prepared to be dragged around, even though Alfred was a smol bean, he was strong. Alfred rolled his eyes and easily walked forward, Kyle being dragged behind him as he went to the kitchen. “I hope you know that I’m gonna have to sit on your lap whenever I sit down right?” Kyle laughed, “ I guess I'll just become an Australian chair from now on.” He smiled and kissed Alfred's neck lightly. Alfred blushed a little as his neck was kissed but grinned. “The most comfy Australian chair ever created.” He smirked as he leaned back against Kyle, almost putting his full weight on the Aussie to knock him down. Kyle smirked, “And don't forget the hottest!” He had to re adjust his standing position before he fell. That would have ended badly with Kyle hitting his head head on a table and then having Alfred be on top of him, using his dead weight to crush him. “Hmm, I don’t know about that~” Alfred said teasingly with a smirk. “I’ve seen hotter~” Kyle scrunched his eyebrows together, “Wait what, who have you seen hotter than me? Was it that guy from the coffee shop? I knew he was hitting on you.” The Australian hugged the American tighter, as if trying to hide him. Alfred chuckled. “Nah, I was thinking more of the dudes from the Calvin Klein commercials~” The Aussie frowned before glaring at the TV, “ Do I need to start wearing fancy underwear too? I will if you want me to.” He snuggled his face into Alfred's hair, still glaring at the TV as if it was the guy from the commercial. Alfred snorted and started laughing. “Dude, why are you so jealous of a commercial, I was just sayin’ that to irk you!” He laughed out and his adorable dimples started to show. Kyle frowned more before smirking, “You know, that wasn't very nice, I think you need some punishment.” He laughed evilly before slowly moving his fingers under Alfred's shirt to his ticklish sides. He started to move his fingers up and down, trying to tickle his boyfriend. Alfred’s eyes widened and he started laughing hysterically while trying to beg Kyle to stop. “N-NO KY-YLE! S-STO-AHAHA-STOP! P-P-PLEASE! HAHAHAA!!” The Aussie grinned and tickled him more, “Not until you agree to watch the movie with me!” He held Alfred closer so he couldn't run away. “Y-YOU ASSHOLE!” He was squirming, trying to get out of Kyle’s grasp desperately. “SH-SHIT! I’M GO-ONNA PEE-HEE!!” He managed to get out through his laughter. Kyle ignored him and kept tickling, “ I'll stop when you agree to watch the movie with me~ c’mon, just a little agreement and I'll stop!” He smirked. Alfred was trying desperately to Kyle’s hands away before he actually pissed himself, refusing to agree to the horror movie. Kyle was tempted to stop before his boyfriend peed his pants but decided to try one more time, “ I'll give you one more chance, watch the movie with me and I'll stop.” Alfred shook his head no, his face red with laughter as he continued to claw at Kyle’s hands to get them away. The Australian sighed in defeat and stopped his tickling before the carpet got soiled,” Fine, but I will get you to watch the movie with me if it's the last thing I do!” Alfred was panting as his laughter died down to giggling. “G-Good luck with that..” He said with a teasing look. Kyle smirked, “ I won't need it.” What was he saying? Of course he needed luck! The Aussie tried almost everything from begging to tickling! What else was there to do!? When Kyle begged Alfred for the 15th time the American threatened him with no sex for a month and that shut him up for a while, but he only shut up try and figure out a plan to trick poor Alfred into watching it with him. After a while of deep thinking, a light bulb suddenly appeared above Kyles head, he would trick Alfred! Get the American to think he would watch an innocent Christmas movie instead of a horror one! Kyle grabbed one of Alfred’s favorite Christmas movies of all time, The Nightmare Before Christmas and took out the CD before replacing it with the CD from Krampus. “Genius.” The Australian thought and ran off to get Alfred and put up an act of defeat to trick him. “Hey, Alfred! Instead of watching Krampus, we can watch The Nightmare Before Christmas, since you are dead set on not watching Krampus. “ The Australian inwardly smirked at his devious plan. Alfred looked over, a large smile plastered on his face as he darted towards the living room, screaming, “FUCK YEAH BOIII!!” Kyle laughed and jogged after his excited boyfriend,grinning at his plan, “ Alright, are you ready?” He said as he held up the DVD. Alfred was bouncing on the couch and nodded eagerly. “I was BORN ready for TNBC!” The Australian laughed and put the DVD into the player before turning off the light and sitting by his boyfriend on the couch. “Alright, movie time.” Kyle hugged Alfred close  so he couldn't run and got comfortable. Alfred grinned and leaned against Kyle’s chest and side. His smiled dropped when he saw the home screen of the movie and it was most definitely NOT The Nightmare Before Christmas, so he started struggling. But to no avail, it seemed that Kyle had an iron grip on him and wouldn’t let go anytime soon. “KYLE YOU FUCKIN’ ASS! I SAID NO KRAMPUS!!!” Kyle grinned and nuzzled Alfred's ear before laughing, “ Aw c’mon,  mate! I'll be here to protect you! Besides! It isn't that bad!” “Isn’t that bad? ISN’T THAT BAD! IT’S A FUCKIN’ HORROR MOVIE AND YOU KNOW HOW I FEEL ABOUT THOSE! ESPECIALLY THE CHRISTMAS ONES!” Alfred screeched and continued to struggle for about 5 minutes until he stopped, panting for breath. God, he needed to get back in shape… Kyle smiled before hugging Alfred more, “No need to get upset! I'll be right here and you can always hide your head in my chest if you get scared~” The Australian purred in his lovers ear. Alfred sent a nasty glare at Kyle out of the corner of his eye. “I will fucking murder you in your sleep Kyle Jacob Smith…..” Kyle laughed nervously and smiled, “B-But if you do then who will cuddle with you and make you smile?...” The Aussie buried his face is Alfred's neck, trying to play cute. “There’s these things called dogs and puppies, and we frankly have 3. So, you won’t be missed a bit.” Alfred said with a deadpan expression, though he was joking. He could never get rid of Kyle, he loved the insane Aussie too much to actually hurt him. Kyle laughed a bit and replied with, “ Oh come on! Those dogs may be cute but they can't do some things only I can~” He grinned and wiggled his eyebrows. Alfred, being the densest little shit to ever exist didn’t get what his boyfriend was getting at and just looked confused. “Like what?..” Kyle stared at Alfred as if he was wondering how clueless he could be, “You're kidding,right?” The Aussie just shook his head and smiled, “ You are too cute.” “Am not…” Alfred pouted, forgetting about the movie playing on the screen as he tried to decipher what Kyle meant by him being able to do something the dogs couldn’t. Kyle laughed and patted Alfred's head, ” Nevermind, don't think too much, just watch the movie.” Alfred nodded and turned his head back to the TV, almost immediately letting out a screech of terror and buried his face in Kyle’s chest. He didn’t care that he was most definitely going to be teased for this later, this shit was terrifying! He couldn’t understand how Kyle could laugh during all the jumpscares and extremely brutal and detailed murders. Kyle laughed at his boyfriend's reaction but shifted slightly so they could both be more comfortable, “Don't worry, Alfie, I'm here.” He ran his fingers through the Americans hair soothingly. Alfred just whimpered in fear and clutched Kyle’s shirt tightly, jolting at every scream coming from the screen. This was also one of the reasons he hated horror movies, he was a complete and total pussy when it came to them. Kyle started to feel bad about making his love watch a movie he didn't want to watch, but it was funny watching him jump. “ Oh Alfred, it's ok, it's just a movie, no need to fret.” The Australian cooed slightly and rubbed his boyfriend's back. “Easy for you to say! You’re like a brick wall when it comes to this stuff!” Alfred grumbled out at Kyle, unaware of the scariest jumpscare of the movie and Kyle’s plan to scare him shitless during it. Kyle just smiled and waited for his chance to strike, sure it was mean but it was going to be funny as hell. I mean, Alfred did scream like a little girl at times. Alfred was about to make the worst mistake of the week as he turned his head just as the jumpscare happened. Just when he looked, Krampus came smashing down from the ceiling, covered in what looked like blood, but that wasn't all, all the sudden hands lightly grabbed his neck and a loudish screen was heard by his ear. Alfred, instead of screaming and flailing around like a normal person, screamed absolute bloody murder and dashed from Kyle’s arms after punching him in the face, along with elbowing him in the ribs, and bolted to the bathroom with a dark patch formed in front of his pants. Mind you, he was still screaming as he bolted away. Kyle yelped and held his nose as a warm liquid started to leak out, “Crap, that backfired.” Even though he was in pain, the insane Aussie still laughed and went to check on the scared American. When Alfred reached the nearest bathroom, he slammed the door open and closed, locking it before curling into a little, shaking ball that wet his pants. Alfred now wished that he went to his and Kyle’s room so he could grab a new pair of pants and underwear while he was in there, but nope, his terrified  mind decided that he needed the bathroom nearest to him. Kyle decided he would be nice and on his way to the bathroom he grabbed a pair of boxers for Alfred and made his way to the bathroom door. “Hey, Alfred, do ya think you could let me in?...Please? I'm bleeding all over, I also brought you some boxers” He wasn't expecting to get let in but it was worth the shot. Alfred glared at the door and cracked it open, snatching the boxers from Kyle and throwing out a first aid kit. “FUCK YOU!” Kyle pulled out some gauze bandages and held it too his nose, “Oh come on, Alfred! Please! I'm really sorry! I just couldn't help myself….please?” The Australian tried wiggling the door knob in hopes it would open. The door was unlocked since Alfred forgot to lock it again and unfortunately, he was just now pulling up the underwear, his ass facing the door so at least Alfred didn’t have to be that embarrassed. Kyle laughed slightly and closed the door as he walked in, “ I'm really sorry, you know…” He wrapped the arm that wasn't holding the gauss around Alfred’s waist and leaned his head on Alfred's shoulder, “Will you please forgive me?” Alfred let out an undignified squeak as he didn’t realize Kyle walked in and slightly relaxed in his grip. “.....Maybe….but you have to do whatever I say for a whole day without complaint!” Kyle sighed but agreed,” If it gets you to forgive me, I'll do anything.” He leaned back and pulled the gauss away since his nose stopped bleeding and threw away the bloody bandage. “Well, since I said I'm sorry, could I have an 'it's ok now’ kiss?” The Aussie grinned. Alfred looked over at Kyle with an unamused look. “Bitch, what do you think?” Kyle frowned but smiled again, “Yes?” He leaned his head towards Alfred's and stuck his lips out slightly. Alfred rolled his eyes and turned around to give Kyle the smallest of lip pecks and started to walk away. “There’s your kiss. Be happy.” Kyle laughed but before Alfred was too far out of reach he leaned over and smacks Alfred's butt,” Oh c’mon! You can do better!” Alfred let out a yelp and turned around to glare at the smug looking Australian. “Tough shit. Suck it up buttercup.” Kyle pouted but picked up Alfred and started to walk towards the couch, “Fine, but you have to cuddle with me instead~” Alfred sighed and laid limp as he was slung over Kyle’s shoulder. “Fine, but you’re turning off the damned movie…” Kyle frowned but let out a dramatic sigh of defeat, “Ffffiiinnneeee” He set Alfred on the couch and took the DVD out of the player and put it in the case. He plopped down onto the couch and pulled Alfred close to his chest. The pissed off American was grumbling but turned around to snuggle into Kyle’s chest, just wanting to be held now, not caring that he was mad at the other anymore, he was warm. ❤

(( Damn these are like, 99% longer then my one shots, I need to step up my game 🐢))