Origami | YA LGBT

The Bull and the Reptide

My legs were almost shaking as Mark turned on the engine and the SUV started to move forward into the depths of that gorgeous but dark neighborhood. I didn't know if I was pissed or nervous, but not a single world came out from my mouth for several minutes. Mark seemed anxious, looking at me sideways on every single traffic light. I was not going to start a conversation, I wasn't able to do so. I needed him to take the initiative, to explain his real intentions. Part of me wanted to jump off the van and run away, but I had to hear what Mark had to say. Even though I would tell everyone I had stayed to get some answers, I knew deep inside I was waiting for his attention.

'So... It's kinda hot outside, huh?' Mark smiled nervously towards me as he was trying to start somehow a conversation.

'I think so...' I said shortly. He had to try harder than that.

'How is Helen doing? Harold told me she isn't pressing any charges against Thomas and let him go. She apparently wants him far but not in jail.' He encouraged to get my attention again 'I think he really likes her. Harold, I mean.'

'Haven't spoke to her since last night.' I responded not even looking at him. The idea of knowing that The Pug was so into my friend and the fact that he knew more about the Thomas thing than I did made me a bit guilty. I had to text Helen as soon as I get home.

'Maybe we can hang. The four of us. Robert may come too. My house is parent-free for almost two weeks.'

'Oh really?' I was being so sarcastic I almost felt bad.

'Okay, Liam...' He raised his voice, giving up to the situation, and parked in the first free spot he could descry next to some kind of church. I was bursting in excitement. This was the moment of truth. 'Sorry for keeping you waiting, for leaving you alone in the garden, for the mystery, for my inability to get involved with the matter...' Mark said with his head down, almost crying, angry with no one but himself.

'The matter...?'

'Look...' His watery eyes stared at mine 'Don't be so hard on me. All this stuff...'

'Sorry, Mark.... but I really need you to tell me whats going on with the proper words. I mean, everything is so confusing to me...'

'Liam...' he held tenderly my left hand with his right '...I don't know yet what I am... Straight, Gay, Bi... I am not ready to label myself in any kind of way. But what I do know is that there's something magnetic in you.' Mark made a pause and continued 'Thanks to Pam's G.B.F. toast, I cleared my doubts and I knew I could take a chance on you.'

'Your doubts?' I was confused.

'I couldn't stop staring at you while you were dancing drunk on your own at the graduation party. I think you were maybe too dazed to notice that I was looking. Since that day, I noticed you were different...'

'Mark... Why me? Why now? After all this years of teasing, it was a relief for me to know that you had been expelled. I was in peace and now you're coming back... Kinder, funnier, cuter...'

<< Fuck... >>

'People may change... Have you said cuter?' Mark dried his shallow tears with his free sleeve, beaming while asking.

'Come on! You already know you're handsome...' I turned tomato red and stopped making eye contact with him, staring at the road 'What I mean is... Why bothering with me when you can have anyone you want?'

'If by "anyone you want" you mean girls like Pamela, you're so wrong, Liam.'

'You looked so great together...' I suddenly remembered the poster and I couldn't help bringing that to the conversation 'I've been at the Promised studio.'

'Oh... and you surely saw that damn pictures. We were dating back then and we felt like the rulers of the world... So stupid! We barely stood each other.'

'You and I both know she is a perfect match for anyone. Pam is gorgeous, popular, rich and smart... She has it all. The total package.'

'Maybe I'm not looking for a girl...'

'And if she was a man?'

'But she is not.'

'You may find a perfect guy for you! There are sure plenty of hunky, popular and wealthy boys out there.'

'Haven't met one yet.'

'What if...'

'Are you going to keep on finding excuses to feel less important or are you focusing in what we have in here?' Mark scolded me, still with a grin on his face.

I simper in response. Sure, I was terrified with the idea of him putting me in the center of his radar, but I felt really flattered with the situation. Our hands were still holding firmly and our eyes met again. We were trying to read each other's mind, smiling when noticing how challenging it would be for us to do that.

'Just... Let's give this a chance. I'm aware I've my own particular pace and I don't expect you to understand or even to bear my issues, but I would like to get to know you better. See where things go.' Mark was serious about it. 'What do you think?'

'Okay. I'd like to.' I was unsure but for once in my life, I trusted my feelings letting my rationality behind 'But try your best not to ditch me like last night.'

'I'll do my best, Lizard.' Mark released my hand, kissed me in the cheek and started the engine. I blushed instantly 'Where should we go now?'

'I don't know where the Bulls like you go...' I mocked him while fastening my seat belt.

'No one addressed me like that since Mid School... The Bull I mean.' He was laughing due to the memory while hitting the road once again. 'So we are Bull, the thug, and Lizard, the green riptide?'

'So funny. You seem so cool and I sound just disgusting.'

'You're not...' He gave me a sassy glimpse 'If so, I would have very bad taste!'

'Shut up! You're such an ass.'

'Maybe I am but you're still here with me.' He said smiling, looking roguishly at me. I smiled back, as the passing lights of the fairway illuminated our faces. And there we were, feeling younger than ever, shyly adventuring together through the night with no clear destination. As our new relationship.