Origami | YA LGBT

Bromance

Do you ever feel that kind of odd sensation of emptiness in the middle of your chest? The feeling of raw anguish running through your own veins that will hardly go away. You see, letting go is never a simple thing. Every single time you lose someone you cared about, you have to carry on no matter what. Period. But there's not any magical solution. The process is hard and will always get longer if you don't face it correctly and in the right spot. That's why mourning is necessary and I was already wearing black. Mark had already dug his own grave and I was pushing him to lay six feet under. And, as you know, dead people cannot talk so I threw the damn letter to the dumpster. Farewell.

After Helen left that same afternoon, I had no better idea than to start jogging again. I knew I couldn't even run half of the distance I was used to dash, but I was not in a competitive mood. I just needed some time to be just with myself and think about my life in general. So I put on my sneakers and took my earphones to hit the road. Once in the porch, when I was getting ready to start my running trip, Lola passed by in her car and waved to me. For a moment I thought she was pulling out but, to my luck, she hadn't even stopped. I wasn't in mood to even start a conversation with her even more so when I knew we were spending a bunch of days together. Thinking of my coming vacations on the beach made me feel a little bit better. I had to get my luggage ready for the day after because our plane was departing in less than 48 hours.

So, after I saw Lola's car disappear in the distance, I started my route in the opposite direction. There's a lovely park a few blocks away my house, so I was planning to trot along the grassy paths under the setting orange sun. The streets were almost empty and I appreciated that. It helped a lot to my introspection. Luckily, even though I wasn't completely sad about what happened hours ago, Helen helped me out to overcome my frustration. She's not Mindy by far but, when it comes to boys, she's an expert.

'Think about it. Mark is just your first approach to the romantic world and it was a - don't get me wrong - very weak one. You guys haven't even kissed and you've made a world of it . Relax, Lizard. You'll find a better dude, for sure.' Helen's voice resounded in my head as I was moving fast forward on the sinuous sidewalk.

She was right. Mindy was right. The fucking world was right. The one's making a big deal about it is me. Am I an immature kidster after all? Sometimes I feel like I'm a thirteen year old girl crying for some hipsterish popstar she would never met. Was Mark worthy of it? I was starting to think he was certainly not.

I shook my head and suddenly stopped in a corner as I saw the red pedestrian light. When I was elongating a bit against a wooden lamppost, I realized in which street I were. Robert's house was two blocks away. It was a long time since I had spoke to him and I wanted to hang a bit alone with him. Some masculine advise would be great right now. So I took my phone out of my zipped back pocket and texted him that I was jogging nearby his house and if he was up to do something.

"Are u right in the corner? Wait for me in there. I'll meet u in 5." He responded and I did so, as I continued my stretching routine. I was getting a bit darker and the street lights were shyly glittering above me.

'Lizard!' A tiny muscled guy was dashing towards me with a white loose tank top and a really shorty pair of shorts. We was already sweating as a pig when he hugged me but I didn't care. He's like my brother. 'I just get home from the gym but some extra aerobic exercise won't harm.'

'I'm planning to get back to the tracks. So I've to start my routines someday.' I said as we started running along heading the park.

'That's cool! I dunno why you had left the athleticism team last year. You were amaze-balls.'

'How are you by the way? I haven't heard about you since Mark's first party.' I said trying to keep my breath. His pace was faster than mine but I tried to keep up. Then I realized that I was out of shape.