I've always liked girls. Looking at them like how I was "supposed" to look at guys.
People have had crushes on me. Even a few have told me. By what about now?
Out to myself. Looking in the mirror. "You are a boy. You are you."
"Try they might. They won't change you."
I pick up my phone. Take a selfie. Making the caption "lol my hand slipped." And smiling wildly. Feeling confident, not using a filter. I normally don't. Normally before posting a picture I get this sudden quick burst of anxiety. But today, I posted t cleanly. Openly.
Comments and my phone blowing up. Jack texting me in all caps "YOU DID IT"
"IKIKIK WHAT NOW?"
"IDK WHATEVER IS TO COME"
He's so supportive. People liked and shared the post. Comments filled with words of support, but also words of hate.
"You're hair was so pretty before!"
"Ugh I hate it."
"IM SO PROUD OF YOUUUU"
"It's so ugly it matches ur face lol"
"ew whyd u do dat? Its a mess."
I turn off my phone and go into my room and skype my internet friends. Jupiter, Leah, and who ever else picked up.
A few people picked up. And once we where all contented. They all said almost like it was planned "oh my god your hair". I think they liked it? I told them I was to go by Dan from now on and they where all 100% okay with this.
After about 3 hours of skype with them, the front door opened. I did said bye to my friends.
My heart raced. You had to tell them one day. I knew that. So why not today.
"MIL!" My mom screamed, "WHAT DID YOU DO TO YOUR HAIR!?" My mother yelling my fathers fave in shock. That's when I sat them down.
"Mom, Dad," the words slipping from my mouth, "I have to tell you something. Okay, you know what transgender is?"
"No," my dad said. I readied for explaining what it is when he said, "We aren't doing this."
Tears scraped at my eyes. I looked down. My face red and ready to cry.
"Honey, Milly, we love you. But we can't love you when you're that."
Thanks mom. You're helping a lot.
"That's not what I was going to say." I say quickly, "I was going to say that... one of my friends came out as transgender." Tears scraping at my eyes. My vision blurry.
"Oh thank God." My mom gasped.
"We thought you're where." My Dad says.
Oh.
"You can't be friends with that person. That's not ever a person." My mom said.
"Okay, I need to go and block them on everything. Love you mom, Dad." I blow kisses. Running upstairs ignoring whatever they yelled.
