A Beautiful Boyfriendship

Chapter Six: The Big Uh-Oh

Just a warning, I'm switching from first person to third person perspective halfway through this chapter.

Once again, I don't own Glee or any of its characters or actors.

Let the CrissColfer times begin!!!

P.S. Plus there's REALLY really drunk Darren and just plain ol' really drunk Chris!!!!! Also, Chris is underage but drinks in this chapter. I am by no means condoning underage alcohol consumption, but I think this is how the story would go.

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Whew. Phase one of the plan was complete. I actually outlined the whole thing in my trailer once I formulated the plan.

Chris's Plan To Tell Darren He's Kissing Him:

Phase 1. Corner Darren in the limo and ask to just come home instead of going out with the rest of the cast. Make sure he says yes.

Phase 2: Once Phase 1 is completed, get Darren loosened up with wine (preferably warm; he finds it more relaxing). Settle yourselves with food. DO NOT DRINK YOURSELF!!!! THIS IS IMPORTANT!

Phase 3: Once Darren is sufficiently loopy, begin to edge the conversation toward Glee and episode sixteen. Slowly come closer to the 'Kliss.'

Phase 4.a.: Tell Darren. Judge his reaction. If he seems okay, no big deal. Continue as you would normally. You may drink now (because c'mon, my 21st birthday is 4 months). Tell Darren again, fully sober, on Monday.

Phase 4.b.: Tell Darren. Judge his reaction. If he seems horrified, laugh it off as a joke. Bribe Ryan on Monday. Never mention it again.

Anyway, now I was on phase 2: Get Darren home and mostly drunk. It shouldn't take much more drinking, because I knew he'd had practically a gallon of alcohol already. The idea wasn't to give him alcohol poisoning! Oh, wait, he was talking. I'd better listen or he'd think something was up. Which it was. But he didn't know that yet.

"Chris? Chris! CHRIS!" he called, shaking my shoulder a little. How long was I spaced out?

"Hmm?" I said, acting distracted on purpose to throw him off the track. Because if he thought something was up, I couldn't just throw it off because I'd obviously been caught. But if I acted weird on purpose, then...wait, I was confused. Reverse psychology did that to me. Remind me again what I was saying? Oh, right, 'Hmm.'

"You spaced out. I was gushing about Harry Potter's ass," Darren giggled, blushing deep red. I rolled my eyes. Darren was obviously at the 'I'm sexually confused' drunk stage. I told myself that no, you can't have him, he's straight. But my slightly alcohol-juiced bloodstream started to plump up an appendage particularly excited about this slip up. Dead kitties, dead kitties, think of dead kitties! And then I mentally congratulated myself because it worked.

"Ohh-kay, Dare, you need to tone down the alcohol level. Look at me," I began with a forced grin, forced because I wanted him to have meant the ass comment. That could open the door to ogling male fictional character's asses, then Kurt's ass, then my ass. But no, focus time. Darren complied and stared into my eyes with those luscious hazel-topaz-gold-bronze-emerald-caramel-chocolate-gorgeous-everything-yummy orbs of his. That stare should be illegal. But wait, he expected me to continue. I think 'dead kitties' once more and finished my train of thought. "Darren Everett Criss. You are straight. That means you like girls' asses, not guys'. 'Kay?"

"Well...what if I like guys' asses too?"

"You just like Harry's ass because you like him."

"I like lots of things."