I was DYING. He wasn't even talking for, like, five minutes. And then, when I finally decide to break the silence, he starts flirting disgustingly, like some sort of animal! It was gross. I decided to try and give him a chance, though. Luke seemed like an okay guy from what Ella had told me. I mean, if this guy didn't at least sound alright, I would've never gone on this stupid blind date in the first place. Maybe he was just bad at first impressions.
After some small talk, which composed mostly of bad flirting on Luke's part, we got in his car. I swear to God, this was probably the oldest, junkiest car I've ever seen. It probably belonged to his grandpa. I kind of expected him to open the door for me, since that's what a guy should do, but I had no such luck. I got into the car, and buckled up, and all that jazz.
He wouldn't tell me where we were going, but he promised it was somewhere good, so I was pretty excited. He decided to put on some music. Yeah, I don't think I've ever met anyone with a weirder taste in music. You know that old song "Take On Me?" Apparently, that's his favorite. Then, he starts playing, like, Sweet Caroline, and then Justin Bieber comes on. Through all of this, he's dancing like a constipated monkey and wiggling his eyebrows at me. It was....grotesque.
He parked the car, but I couldn't really see where we were from that angle. I was pushing the door open, but then he decided to open it for me, so he ended up hitting himself with the door. I tried not to laugh at him, but I couldn't help myself. He looked like a total idiot! When I got out of the car, though, I realized where we were.
Burger King. Yeah. Burger King.
He places his order, and I do the same, and he's about to pay when he tells me he forgot his stupid wallet. Greeeat. Marvelous! Because that's how you when a girl over: make her pay on the first date. Fantastic! So, I ended up paying.
We sat down, and I was just about to start talking to him when I look up and see his face stuffed with cheeseburger. Okay, sure. Without another word, I pecked at my fries quietly. I could not believe this guy. I was gonna kill Ella, I swear. At this point, I'm waiting for my bail out call. Thanks a lot, Michaela! Real helpful!
Finally, he actually said something. "Nice weather we're having." Seriously? The weather? The two of us end up chatting about storm clouds when he tells me that he plays basketball. Without even giving me time to comment, he launches into this huge saga about how he lead his team to victory against Lakewood. It was the most interesting thing he'd said all night, and it was still stupid. Somehow the conversation transferred to hockey, another sport that I can't stand.
I was sort of scared of what would happen if I interrupted him, so I just listened to the dumb hockey story. After a while, it was almost over. Amen. I was in such a rush to get that date over with, that I forgot my jacket. We weren't even that far from Burger King when I realized, but you know what he told me? He said I can "get it on my own time." Seriously!
At this point, I was infuriated, but we made it to my house before I could do anything about it. I practically leaped out of the car, and nearly sprinted to my front door, only to find that he was following me. Lovely. The two of us made it to my front door, and I said a hasty goodbye. Only then did I realize what was happening. Was he seriously trying to kiss me? No way was he going to get that chance. I ran into my house, shutting my door.
And that was my super romantic date.
YOU ARE READING
First Impressions
HumorThis is a piece intended to be performed through the spoken word. It was written as part of a school project, and is in no way some of my best work. Still, read if you'd like.
