A brown girl's thoughts

My family

Going to vent/rant about some of my family members and their ignorance,prejudices, etc
To be continued
So I'm going to do this in sections.
1) my parents
I've always known my parents were prejudice/racist towards black people. When I was younger they've always made stereotypical comments or just down right ignorant ass things about them. But then I didn't know what those comments meant and now I've become more aware and realizing their views about them.
Whenever my dad sees black people doing anything remotely negative he always feels the fucking need to make a comment about them, like "fucking lazy "negros"*** or "nasty negros". One time I was in the car with my dad and there was an black man literally just riding his bike and my dad just said "pinche negro (fucking black)" i don't understand why he has these kinds of views. I feel like he's had a bad experience with a black person, but he shouldn't apply that with black people.
As for my mom, she's never a comment like that, but she does believe in the negative stereotypes. One New Year's Eve we went to my aunts house for a party and my aunt told my mom that they had been robbed when they were out on Christmas Eve. Then my my mom says "I bet it was the 'morenos' that live in across the street" and my aunt nods in agreement. I was kind of taken a back at my moms comment but I knew she thought that. The second incident was when were went to drop off Tupperware at a family member's house and before we got off of the car my sister put her phone in the glove compartment and my mom said "you're going to leave phone here? What if 'un moreno'( a black person) steals it?" And that got me mad. I wanted to say something but I was nervous about how she would respond. I remember one time we were talking about race (i don't remember how) and the was talking about black people. She said that (paraphrasing here) "I know some black ppl are bad and some are good, it's like that with all races, there are some black people that are terrible and lazy wearing ugly clothes and then there are the good ones that are dressed nicely in suits" I was confused about what and how she said that bc that would be judging someone based on what they wear also I know damn well she doesn't apply that to other races as a general judgement. In her mind "bad" clothes= lazy and bad and suits= good and well mannered.

2) my big sister
Me and my big sister are 9 years apart and I don't really like her. We don't have anything in common and we've never had a real conversation. She's probably the most problematic. She grew up with minorities in high school and sometimes there isn't a problem when saying the word "n*gga" but when got older she didn't say it as much. One day texted me with her new number and I asked who it was and she replied "me!"(mssg1) "n*gga"(mssg2) and I replied with "don't say that please" all she said was ok.
One day me my sister were going to the mall and as we left my 7 year old brother asked if he could go with us and she said no, my brother then got upset and was about to cry. Them my sister said "stop crying you baby, are you a girl? Boys don't cry! Now go inside with your girly eyelashes (he has long lashes)." I told my sister "don't say that, it's not ok"
"Shut the fuck up! Stop being so damn offended, can't you take a joke?"
Then at that point I knew that I wasn't going to get anywhere with her. I had already tried to call her out once before. She was texting someone and she asked me how to spell Tourettes. And asked "what do you mean"
"You know Tourettes, like *she then starts to mock it making twitching movements while laughing*"
I told her " if your going to use the word to make a joke, don't because thats not okay and offensive"
She just said "ok ok whatever, shut up"
The event that I was most appalled about was last year at a birthday party. My sister , my cousin, me and some other kids were in the living room just hanging out. My cousin has a mixed race kid (Mexican and black) and he was playing with my sisters daughter.( these kids are toddlers) and they were playing around with a toy gun and my niece started to hold the gun towards my cousins kid. My sister saw what was going on and thought it was funny so she took a picture for snapchat. The picture was my niece holding gun to my cousins kid and him being cornered. My sister was talking to my cousin about what she should captionm it. My sister then said "what about
'#blacklivesmatter' haha"

BiTCH WHaT the FuK? That just got me so fucking ticked off and that's when I knew that my sister was ignorant asf.🙄🙄😒

Anyways those are all the incidents I've encountered. I think dealing with ignorance and racism in families is different than other people. Because these are the people you live with. You have to put up with them until you are able to move or distance yourselves from them. I want to confront them but my parents will probably not take me seriously and laugh saying "ok ok i understand" or mock me for what I'm trying to call them out for and make them understand what they said/did was wrong and toxic. I know this is common in the Latin community. There is a lot of racism and stereotypical beliefs. Mainly towards black peoples and how we call all assigns "chinos" (Chinese) .but we as a minority have a shared struggle. I don't know why we separate ourselves even more than we already are. It needs to be put into light and talked about.

***(negro) in Spanish we use negro (black) and moreno (brown) to identify black people. I've always used moreno. I don't feel comfortable using the word negro, I think because in my experience it's always been used with a bad connotation. But I know that in other areas it's viewed differently. Whether it be just a word or a racial slur. I just wanted to make that clear.

That it. I know it's sloppy and grammatically incorrect but I did this in a hurry. Sorry
I know I haven't been here in a while but I have a lot of topics o want to talk about soon so stay tuned lol :)