Without You

2

"What the HELL were you thinking Phil?!" Dan asked me when he sat down next to me. we were back in our flat and he handed me some tea.

" I... I don't know." was all i could manage to say. How pathetic of me. ' I don't know ' ?, I know what I was going to do, and i know what i wanted to say. but nothing would come out.

"Phil, If...If i hadn't have come earlier..." He trailed off, I guess not having the guts to say what I knew he was going to say.

"Just. Why? I want to know why Phil" he said looking at me.

I couldn't do it, I couldn't tell him that I was going jump, or the fact that I have had depression. Or the fact that I love him.

"I, I'm sorry." I sniffled holding my hand in front of my mouth, feeling all the warm tears fall down my face. I felt like shit.

As I could feel my cries becoming into sobs, I felt something reach for my hand, I opened my eyes and saw Dan's soft, pale hand, hold onto mine. I looked at it, and then looked up to Dan. He leaned n close... and his arms wrapped around my upper back, and his entire body was just wrapped around me, his nose nuzzled into the crook of my jaw. 

"Shh, Philly. I got you." He whispered to me, as his hands swept up and down my back. My arms wrapped around his neck and I cried into his shoulder. Letting everything out. He continued to shush me, and pet me softly, until I just became quiet. Dan released me and looked into my eyes, me starring right into his dark chocolate ones, with just a slight shimmer in them.

"It's going to be okay." was all he said. I had missed this. Dan kept so much distant from me, ever since he got his girlfriend Vanessa. She was always here, and whenever she was, Dan was always "busy" with her. if you know what i mean. she ripped him apart from me, she stole my Dan. 

"Come on Philly, it's late. And you look so tired" He said getting up from the couch, he was still holding onto my hand, and he lead me up too, and held onto it until we reached my room. as i crept into my bed, i felt my eyes begin to feel more heavier and heavier.

"goodnight Lion" Dan said smiling slightly, closing my door.

"W-wait!" I said to Dan, before the door shut.

"C-can you stay with me. P-please?" I asked him.

"Of course" Dan answered and closed the door behind him, and slid underneath the covers next to me. he put his arm around me and held me close, so close i could feel his soft breathing on my forehead. 

He held me like that, like a child practically. 

I fell asleep in his embrace.