Love Wounds

Part 4 & 5

4

Have you ever done something, without fully thinking of the consequences? Then one day, somewhere down the line, you wake up and realize you wish someone had invented a time machine and you could steal back time. You'd go back and undo your stupidity.

Well that's where I was. That night at the club seemed to follow Deron and I forever. Two weeks after that fateful night, he asked me again to be his woman. In fact, he sent me the most romantic text message that I had ever received:

Okay listen Shawnee, I adore u more than I ever imagined I would. Every second I'm around you I'm on top of the world. Holding your hand, puts me on an incomparable high. The taste of your sweet kisses daze me and the softness of your lips stay with me until we are together again. Your eyes have somehow pierced into my heart. Holding you calms my inner dragon. I need you. All jokes aside. Say you will be my woman, and allow me to be your man?

See...isn't that the sweetest thing? He showed up at my apartment later that evening and asked me to go for a midnight walk around my neighborhood with him. We sat on the steps of the local elementary school and talked. It was so simple, yet so romantic. Being in his arms, holding his hand, was everything I thought it would be. MAGIC!!!

"Ask me again," I said with my head resting on his knee as I sat a stair below him, in between his legs.

"Hmmm?" He responded stroking the side of my face.

"Ask me again,"

"Ask you..."

"What you asked in the text," I said and turned to face him.

He looked down at me and smiled, "Shantel, will you be my...?" He began. I leaned forward and kissed him tenderly.

"Hmmm, is that a yes?" He asked smiling back at me.

"Yes, of course it's a YES!"

He pulled me close to him and kissed me, wrapping his arms around my back holding me tighter. If this wasn't an elementary school, I would have taken him right on those stairs. But, instead, he took my hand and we resumed our walk around the school yard and then back to my apartment where we made love. I wanted to cry he was so gentle. I had always referred to our sexual encounters before as just having sex, but that night...that night, he made love to me for the first time.

5

Our first month together was pure heaven. I never knew a love like the love he gave to me. It was so much more than physical. We even talked about waiting to pause all sexual relations until we were more solidified or married. Imagine how lucky I felt. My whole life had been about sex, and here was a man entertaining that we keep it mental and grow. We didn't go out much, like on dates, but we spent time together. He'd pick me up, bring me to work, pick me up from work or drop by after his daily events were over for a few minutes here and there. He seemed to know exactly what I needed and he had no problem providing it. The emotional things, that is. That was the side of a relationship no one had ever been able to fulfill for me before.

When I prayed for a partner or a husband that was the most important factor on my list of MUST's as far as a quality he had to possess. He had to have an emotional side. He had to know all my fears and doubts and be understanding of my past. It felt like my prayers had been answered, not to mention I had a secret fire burning for him from many years ago. It felt like he was the one that got away, but somehow was returned to me. I wasn't going to mess this up. I swore that much to myself.