The Aesthetic Question

Building

[Baby Steps - TTS]

The foyer of the publishing company was glamorous, but much smaller than what Maple had imagined. However, she was glad that it wasn't obnoxious and intimidating or she would jump out of her own skin.

She was directed to one of the conference rooms to talk with her editor. It was a quaint room with floor-to-ceiling windows facing a refreshing view of the ocean. The sofas were placed in a circular fashion and with a faux fireplace at the end of one wall, the room appeared almost good enough to live in. Though, Maple could argue that she preferred cozier workplaces like a bed.

When she did glimpse the tea tray atop the long mahogany table, she changed her mind. A middle-aged woman with a floral dress that probably found in the 1960s walked up to her. They exchanged hand shakes and small talk about the weather before sitting down with their laptops.

'Help yourself to the pastries, dear.'

'Thanks!' Maple replied enthusiastically.

They progressed from small talk to editing details over the course of a morning and afternoon. Maple, the witty person she was, had no difficulties conversing with someone nearly double her age. It's a good things the older woman, whose name was Lily, was sweet but crisp in expressing her opinion. Already Maple could tell they would get along just fine.

She was given a deadline two months later to make changes to her draft. It turned out there were more changes to be made than she anticipated. At one point, she was taken aback by Lily's blunt request to alter a pretty big part of the plot. She felt a little sour having to change something she spent the past year polishing. But she understood that to make it sell, she had to squash her opinions a bit to fit the general public's preference. She felt a bit uneasy though, given that this was just the start.

When 3 o'clock approached, Maple bid Lily goodbye for her afternoon shift in the café. She bribed one of her colleagues with a doughnut to cover one hour of her original shift to fit her meeting in. Her schedule turned out perfectly but she was exhausted. It's hard to muster energy to stand behind the till, let alone deal with shitty customers with horrid attitudes.

It appeared that she would have to live through juggling shifts and writing though, as one of them finally took a turn for the better. Maybe it really is possible to step out of the shadows once you've walked far enough.

* * *

To be frank, Alex had yet to take a test or an audition that he's satisfied with. Perhaps that's the thing with him. He would never feel good enough, his parents made sure of that. Even at an age where he had not lived with his parents for years, he could still hear the criticisms, at his violin skills, at his academic results, at his hyperactive behaviour. They were the reason he tried so hard to overcompensate for his lack of confidence. But that was hardly anything anyone would like to bring up in conversations.

This audition was no different from all the others. There were so many details he could've perfected had he been in the right state of mind. He was so adamant that mistakes tended to be amplified in the ears of those who mattered he drove himself insane. Everyone complimented how calmly he behaved in stressful situations, but then they were also jealous of his confidence.

He paid all the other people here for audition no heed, choosing to scroll through his phone once he settled in the waiting room. Immediately after he finished the audition and curtly thanked the judicators he left the centre.