Dempeo songfics

Amnesia

Patrick POV:

My life is crap. She's gone and it's all been downhill since she left. I decide to climb into my car and go for a drive to try to clear my head. I don't know why I thought this was a good idea though because now I'm just driving past all of our old places and all the memories are flooding back.

I decide to head back home and somehow end up at the studio. I park across the street and stare at our old trailer. I remember our last kiss, how it felt, how it tasted. 

Justin sees me, there's no point in hiding now. I try to force myself to catch up with him, but all that comes out is "how is she?"

Just tells me "she's doing fine." I just shake my head and look down, that's what everyone tells me. I want a real answer, but know I won't get one. I want to know if you're feeling lonely even with Chris with you. When he says those words that hurt you, do you read the ones I wrote you. Do you even still have that note I left? Was what we had real, or just a lie? Are you fine while I feel like I'm going to die? 

I remember the day you told me you were leaving, I remember the makeup running down your face. You say you had to go because you didn't want to be the one to break up my family, no matter how many times I told you me and Jillian had been over for a long time. I wish that I could wake up with amnesia and forget the stupid little things. Like the way it felt to fall asleep next you and the memories I never can escape. 

I still have all the pictures you sent me, and still look at them all the time. I can't even turn on my tv without it hurting hearing your name all over the news. I'm glad you're so successful, but I miss you so much.

If I woke up with you right beside me, like all of this was just a dream. I'd hold you closer than I ever did before, and I'd never let you slip away. But, I can't be the one to ruin your life, I have to let you be happy. I just wish I could wake up with amnesia and forget it all to get away from all the memories I can't escape.