Dan's pov
My shaking hand reached out for the knife. It felt heavy in my hand, and as I carefully pressed the blade to my skin, an icy cold sensation spread throughout my body. As i was about to draw the knife along my arm, a voice in my head stopped me. Is this what you want? If you cut once, you'll cut again. Don't get caught up in that endless circle of scars.
Feeling like I'd achieved something, I put the knife back down. I soundlessly made my way back to my room. I remembered the day I'd showed it to Phil, it seemed like years ago. Everything was normal then, we were just friends. We could spend time in each other's company, without the long, echoing silences that now stretched between us. It seemed like our lives were drifting apart, like a widening canyon, me on one side, him on the other. If he could accept me into his life, for who I am and how I feel, I'd be able to forgive him for anything.
Phil's pov
I ran.
Out of the flat.
Away.
As far away as I could get from Dan. I ran past a fountain, the cool droplets, cooling my heated body. I soon found myself thinking of our time by that fountain in London. Where I first realised I loved Dan- and more importantly, where I realised he loved me back. I couldn't bare to hurt him, that I would, was inevitable. I would never feel comfortable with him in my arms in public, having people judging me for having a boyfriend. If I forget about my feelings, they'll just go away right? I stopped running. I was panting and out of breath. I remembered our kiss, how I'd felt like the happiest person in the world, like all my problems had just disappeared. His small and stammering voice before, 'Um...well...I wished t-that you will love me'
I spoke into empty space.
Phil: I do love you Dan.
I got up, and started walking back.
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Hey people :)
Hope you like our story so far :) Sorry it's a bit of a short chapter :( next one will be longer <3
no comments so no dedication for this chapter :'(
See you in chapter 12!
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Our Story - A Phanfic
FanfictionDan Howell and Phil Lester have known each other since childhood. They are the best of friends, doing everything together. It all changes when they leave university, into the world. But - together, or alone? Read this phanfic to find out! -You don'...
