Sidemen One Shots

Lachdon - I Broke Him

Inspiration from MichaelFoley2: But my homeboy. :( maybe I have a though. That he was with Landon, and he broke up with him because of Preston, and now Preston is trying to get with Lachlan instead and that's why he is so scared. That he still loves Landon and feels like it's his fault for not sticking by the younger man while Preston was pressuring Landon to end it so that he could be with him.

POV - Lachlan

Warnings: Depression, Anxiety, Yelling, Anger, Light Physical Violence, Depression, Anxiety (This is not a nice One Shot)

Word Count: 5700 (freaking hell....)

-Begin One Shot-

I stared up at my ceiling, watching the fan go around and around in a slow circle, hypnotizing me into a unmotivated sheep. Oh wait, I already was one.

I haven't uploaded in over a week, touched Twitter, or even looked at Skype. My phone was uncharged and laying on my side table, mocking me. I should probably charge it so I could tell the people I care about that I was still alive but then I would be met the background picture that would send me back to this state all over again.

The picture itself haunts me, even during my sleepless nights. The bright smiles of me and the greatest, most amazing, sweetest boy I have ever come to love looking at me, mocking me, asking me why?

Why did I leave him? He loved me.

Why did I push him away? He needed me.

Why did I lie to him? His cousin made me.

I didn't want to leave the love my life, the boy who is constantly on my mind, memories of our happy times together filling my mind, torturing me.

I wanted to be with him forever. I wanted to keep him by my side till the end of time. I wanted to put a ring on his finger and call him mine. I wanted to show the whole world that he was mine.

Unfortunately for me, there were certain people in the world who didn't agree with that, who didn't want me him to be happy, all because he wanted me to himself.

I wasn't an idiot, I could see clear as day what Preston was doing when he pressured me to break up with Landon, threatening to expose secrets that belonged to my friends and not the world. They weren't even secrets about me which is what made it all so fucked up.

I don't even know how he found any of it out anyway.

Due to the pressure Preston put on me I had break up with the one person I truly loved with all my heart, lying to him and telling him that it wasn't working out between the two of us, that I needed someone closer to my age and so did he, telling him that it would be easy for him to move on, just like it would be for me.

I don't remember how many holes I put in Preston's wall before I left, but I can remember the pain in my knuckles, knees, and toes. I was so angry at myself. I was so weak. I should have stood up to him, told him no and to go fuck himself, that he could do whatever he wanted and that I wouldn't care.

I am a fucking piece of shit.

I turned my attention back from my self-deprecating thoughts and watched the ceiling fan again, doing my best not to imagine Landon next to me, cuddled up to my side, his arm thrown over my waist while his head rested on my shoulder, his thick brown hair hanging in front of his eyes as he slept. Such a beautiful picture in my mind, I just wish it didn't fill me with such pain.

I felt the tears begin to fall from my eyes once again and I laughed.

I could have sworn I was all cried out.