Battle Scars // Calum Hood

An Impossible Promise to Keep

         I woke up that morning wrapped in Calum's arms. I lifted my head a bit to check the clock, and it said 7:55 am. I freaked out in my head for a second, thinking that I would be late for school, before I realized that it was still winter break. I let my head fall back onto the pillow and I relaxed, closing my eyes. Calum was still asleep, but his arms were wrapped around me so tightly it was almost as if he thought I was going to run away from him. I thought it was cute. 

        My mind wandered back to the previous night, Calum saving me, holding me in his arms as I cried. Any other guy, I thought, would have not known what to do if they had seen a girl crying. I don't know if Calum was just naturally this kind and loving, or if he had had lots of experience. I doubted that, though, since he didn't really seem like the kind of guy that would jump from one girl to the next. I tried to fall back to sleep, but I couldn't. All I could think of was last night. I thought about Logan, and about almost cutting myself. That was a terrifying thought. I knew that if I started cutting again, that I would never be able to stop, and I would fall into a deeper depression. Still, I felt like just one cut might help ease the pain. I wanted to. I probably would have if Calum hadn't saved me, and come home with me. I would have been all alone with my razor, and no one could have been able to stop me. I started thinking about Calum, and how nice he had been to me. Only my friends were ever that nice to me. I fell asleep again, this time happy, knowing that I had Calum there to hold me in his arms.

      I woke up again about 3 hours later. Calum was asleep, but as soon as I woke up, he started to stir. He opened his eyes and looked at me. I smiled at him, But his face turned serious. He sat up and brought his face unbearably close to mine. "Promise me," He said in a serious voice. I got a little scared. "Promise you what, Calum?" I replied, not understanding what was happening. He grabbed my wrists and pointed at my scars. "Promise me that you'll never hurt yourself like this again. Promise me," he said again, his voice and expression still dead serious. I looked down, the shame from last night coming back to me. "I can't," I said quietly, refusing to look into his eyes. He let go of my wrists and moved his face even closer, stroking my cheek.

      "Yes, you can. You have to. I can't let you keep doing this to yourself! I won't! Promise me!" he said in a serious, yet sad voice. A tear fell onto his cheek. I didn't want to hurt him. Even though I barely knew him, I knew I couldn't let him be sad because of me. "I promise," I said, this time looking directly into his eyes. I stared at him for a moment before he took my cheek in his hand and kissed me. It wasn't a desperate, needy kiss though. It was a soft, sad kiss. He was being very gentle, as if he might break me if he went too rough. We kissed like this for a while. 

        Suddenly, the kiss changed. It turned into a passionate, needy kiss like the ones we had before. He gripped my waist and pushed me against my bed, hovering over me without breaking the kiss. He slipped his tongue into my mouth expertly, causing me to moan. He broke away from my lips and started to kiss his way to my sweet spot, sucking on it lightly. I gasped and grabbed a handful of his hair, causing him to moan against my skin. He kissed his way down my neck, leaving a trail of hickeys but I didn't care. I didn't want him to stop. I pulled my hands away from his hair and ran them down his perfect abs. I groaned as he kissed my collarbone. He stopped at my shoulder, knowing better than to go that way and continued down. 

        As he kissed my neck, I could feel his hands move their way up my tank top. I knew I should have stopped him, but everything he was doing made me feel too good to care. I felt as if I was melting into him. He started kissing my lips again. I soon realized what he was doing with his hands under my shirt and started to get a little worried. I didn't want him to take advantage of me. I was about to tell him to stop when he pulled his hands out. He pulled away from my lips and rested his forehead on mine.