Walking Me Home (Dean x Reader)

CHAPTER 4

You had been hunting with the Winchester for over three months now and things never seemed to get boring with them. They had become the closest thing to a family you've had in years. 

Sam was your best friend, no doubt about it. You could spent hours and hours arguing and talking about pretty much anything, always pushing you to be better, to be smarter, to be more confident. 
Dean, on the other hand, had you falling head over heels for him. He flirted with you every single time he had a chance to do it, he was always finding new ways to be near you, to touch you, to hug you, to let you know he cared, making you love him even more. 

There were times that you even found yourselves sleeping in each other's arms but still, the idea of doing anything about it made your bones chill. Mainly because you didn't want to ruin what you had with him, even if it was only friendship. And secondly, there was a tiny voice in your head that constantly whispered you weren't smart enough, pretty enough, good enough for him so you ignored your feelings. He made it difficult though.



The last hunt completely tore you down, emotionally and physically. It was an easy case for a change but particularly today, you were out of this world. Dean noticed it but since you hadn't had the chance to open up to him, he decided it was best to just respect your space. After the hunt, you were heading to the motel room to clean up and get some rest.



With the boys, you were always funny and bright, singing along to Dean's songs, dancing and being a complete dork, stealing smiles from them but this time was different, this time you were completely numb.
 The car ride was quiet, you were lost in your thoughts as your eyes were locked in the backseat window. You missed the concerned look Dean and Sam shared with each other.



Your parents were hunters themselves before they had you and your younger sister, they got out of the life but once you were older enough to take care of her, they started hunting again. Sometimes they locked you in some motel room with enough food and water for days, other times they dropped you both off at their friend's house. Sometimes for months on end until you turned seventeen. 

Your sister was killed by a demon while you were outside a motel room working on a car you had just bought. She must had been alone for not even an hour but he managed to get her and kill her almost instantly. You opened the door not believing the scene before you. You had lost the only thing that kept you going in this life; your ten year old sister and today, was the anniversary of her death.



People were pissed at you, specially your parents. This happened on your watch, you only had one job, one responsibility and you screwed things up. Your sister was dead and her blood was on your hands, no matter how anyone tried to convice you otherwise. You did your best to live with it but your parents were always there to remind you she wasn't there anymore because of you so you ran off never speaking to them again. Hell, you didn't even know if they were still alive but you didn't care, to be honest. They wanted nothing to do with you and you couldn't even look at them in the eyes so it worked both ways. 



After hunting the demon that killed your little sister, quiting the job seemed the smartest idea though you had nothing else to offer the world. You were a dropout, you didn't know how to do anything that wasn't hunting related so you embraced it as your life. And you were damn good at it.



Today felt like a reminder that she wasn't here anymore because of you. She wasn't going to go to college, she was never going to fall in love, get married, anything and it was all because of you.
 So you let everything sank in that big ocean of self-loathing you had inside of you. Another drop couldn't hurt, right?



You entered the motel room and headed straight away to the bathroom, the smell of mixed blood and sweat was making your stomach sick. You let the steam fill your lungs and the hot water roll off of you, rinsing the day away. Getting out of the shower and taking a look at the mirror was the hardest part. The dissapointment filled your eyes as you did your best to not breakdown, keeping everything inside once again but you just couldn't do it.
 You were exhausted, emotionally drained and at this point, you didn't even care how weak you looked or which lines you were crossing. You needed Dean right now. Even if it was a quick hug or some words, you needed him around. 

You got out of the bathroom to find him all alone sitting by the table, his boots kicked off, his plaid shirt hanging by one of the chairs.


- "Sam's renting another room. Aparently I've been snoring lately and he can't even sleep anymore" he shook his head chuckling but then found his way to meet his eyes. He somehow he just knew. 

You nodded with a smile then sat on the edge of the bed, just staring at your bare feet, your hands running up and down your thighs, somehow trying to shake off the feeling of  wanting to bawl your eyes out in front of Dean.


He lay on his back and you did the same. Not saying a word, both of you stayed there staring at the ceiling. A tear began running through your cheek.

"Sweetheart?" his voice sounded broken, laced with concern. "Come here" he practically demanded, opening his arm so you could rest your heard on his chest. Soon enough, you found yourself drifting off with your arm wrapped snugly around the older Winchester, instantly buring your face in his warm chest. This started to feel like home.


You didn't dare to meet his eyes, this side of you was the one you always hid from everyone but today, you couldn't do it anymore. His hand running up and down your back, trying to calm the anguish you had in you for so long while you sobbed and cried like never before. 
He didn't ask. He didn't meddle. He was just there for you, not saying a word and letting you crumble apart completely in front of him.



Your arms wrapped around his back, clinging onto him, letting him bring you back to solid ground. He gripped you tightly, tangling his legs in with yours. "I'm right here and I'm not going anywhere" he whispered before placing his lips to your forehead. You knew your tears were soaking his shirt. He managed to help you calm down, just by saying a few simple words.

- "I'm sorry" you let out in a whispered, broken voice.


- "Don't be" he shushed before you could continue. He lifted your chin to meet your puffy reddish eyes.


- "Don't look at me like that, I look horrible" you looked down with a half-smile. He lowered his glare trying to meet your eyes again.


- "I think you are beautiful" he cupped your cheek. "I need you to know you are not alone. Not anymore. You have Sam, you have me. You no longer need to keep everything inside. Please, don't do it again" he pleaded, pressing his lips in your head again.


- "I know, I'm sorry. I promise I'll tell you all about it just... not now. Not tonight" you buried your face again in his neck.


- "Whenever you want, I'll be here".