Me, myself, and tommo

"Eleanor! I'm home sugar baby" Louis said when he walked through the door

"GREAT! NOW YOU CAN STAY AT HOME AND WATCH ME HAVE MY PERIOD!!!" Eleanor was always exited at the thought of her boyfriend watching her bleed from her vagina.

"Oh yeah. In a little bit"

Louis went into the kitchen and opened the boiling pot on the stove to see what Eleanor had been cooking for dinner tonight.

"Ah. Fresh stew. My favorite" Louis whispered while uncontrollably licking his lips and massaging his ball sack I'm a circular formation.

Louis yelled to Eleanor from the kitchen to the bathroom, "Are you on your period right now Eleanor? I have to urinate."

"I think I will be a little while. If you cannot hold yourself you may urinate in the stew"

"I think I'll do that. Thanks love" Louis pulled down his pants and positioned himself over the boiling pot of stew on the stove.

"FUCK FUCK FUCK WHAT THE FUCK OH SHIT FUCK FUCK" he yelled in pain

Eleanor reacted to the screaming and immediately rushed out of the bathroom bleeding with her pants down and headed to the kitchen to assist her boyfriend

"LOUIS!? What happened?"

"WHAT DOES IT LOOK LIKE YOU STUPID BITCH?! I'VE BURNED MY PENIS ON YOUR RUBBISH STEW!" Louis' face was red with anger

"Oh no baby I'm so sorry. Here let me clean you up." Eleanor gently lifted Louis up out of the pot and set him down on the couch."

Eleanor paced around the room thinking of a solution to cure Louis' throbbing penis

Louis sat up , "Eleanor?"

"Yes baby?"

"I'm sorry for snapping. I was in a lot of pain. If you had a penis you would surely understand"

Eleanor responded with a shrug

"Come here" he said softly

Eleanor walked toward him

"I love you"

Eleanor's face lit up with joy

"I love you too"

Louis stood up, placed both hands on Eleanor's face and gave her a kiss in her forehead. He then whispered, "Your not a stupid bitch and your stew is pleasantly delicious"

The two fell asleep on the couch with Eleanor's head resting on his chest.