Strands of Blue

Chapter 2: Groceries

I felt the warmth of the sun hitting my eyelids through my curtains. I didn't move, I tried not to think. All I wanted to do was lay there and breathe. I heard footsteps down the hall, boots. They were my father's footsteps, he always wore heavy boots. I got up and quietly followed him.

"Where are you going?" I asked. He was startled.

"Nowhere, I... was going to get some groceries for the family." He responded. I didn't believe him. He hesitated and his voice was shaky.

"I'll go with you." I said. He looked down at his boots and then back up at me.

"Sure." He didn't sound too happy. I knew he was lying. He was going to leave without saying anything to anyone. I quickly got dressed and followed him out of the door. I wanted to make sure that he wasn't actually going to leave.

"So is this really happening?" I asked him. He started the car.

"Yeah I guess so, Al. See me and your mother-"

"I don't want to hear it." I cut him off. I honestly didn't want to hear anything he had to say. I was already so angry. I didn't want to start another fight. I didn't even look at him the entire time we were in the car. I stared outside of the window and watched all of the other cars go by. I rolled down the window and took a breath of the fresh morning air. This was the only thing that felt normal to me in that moment.

"You know you're old enough to choose who you live with if we do go through with this, right?" Dad asked. The words that spilled out of his mouth made my skin tingle. Did he not know how to keep his mouth shut?

"I can't believe you just said that to me! Are you trying to win my vote or something?" There was a long pause.

"Al..." His voice cracked. Was he crying? I couldn't tell, because I didn't want to look at him.

"I wasn't trying to win your vote, I'm just preparing you for the worst. I love you kids, even if it seems like I stopped caring. This is an emotional decision for everyone in this family and I'm sorry I've made this hell. Your mother and I loved each other, but there is a point in time where you need to get up from the table when love is no longer being served. I'm getting up from the table, Al." Dad said. I wanted to cry, but I didn't.

"Let's just go home." I said quietly.

"But the groceries... " Dad responded.

"Oh shut up, Dad! You and I both know that this whole thing wasn't about groceries!" I yelled at him. He turned the car around and sent us on our way home. Nothing was said after that. It was completely silent aside from the other cars, and Dad's road rage.

I went into the kitchen and helped my mother with the dishes. Her cheeks were red and puffy as if she'd been crying for hours. She probably had been for all I knew. Ella hadn't come out of our room since the previous night and I didn't blame her. You could feel the despondency through the walls of the entire house. I went in and checked on my dad who was staring at the blank TV with a beer in his hand. I sighed and decided that the negative energy wasn't for me. I put on my boots and my jacket and headed out of the door. The neighborhood was quiet. The air was cold yet humid, and the sky was a depressing light grey.

"Hey Al!" I heard a voice behind me. I hadn't heard the voice in a while, but I was happy to hear it again. I turned around and saw Beau running toward me.

"Beau! It's been a while, walk with me!" I said, excited to see my old friend again. I hadn't been that happy in a long time.

"What have you been up to, Al-pal?" Beau said, nudging my arm.

"Well I've been up, then down, then all around."

"Everything ok?"

"No, actually it's been quite the roller coaster through hell." I explained everything to Beau and his facial expressions go from happy to concerned within seconds.

"You know what Al? Let's go out tonight, you and me. Like old times." Beau said. I nodded hesitantly. There was a reason I hadn't hung out with him in a while, and I didn't like the sound of 'like old times'.