Chapter 8 - I Said Don't Touch Me

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At the edge of my consciousness I registered a touch.

"DON'T TOUCH ME!!" I screamed and sat up before I could take in anything else. I fought to become alert and realised I was somewhere familiar, my room at the castle.

The light was soft around me and for a moment déjà vu confused me, pain in my left shoulder, bindings, and this room. As I shook my head to clear it a plait of my silver blonde hair fell on my shoulder, and snapped me back to the present. I sensed I was not alone and turned my head to see Lord Shingen was sitting on my right, his expression grim, and his eyes concerned.

I pulled the robe I was wearing around me, drew up my knees and sank my head onto them, I didn't want to lie back down.

"Tamara." His voice was so soft, so inviting, I could feel it reaching out to me.

It almost came through a door in my mind.

I slammed the door shut.

"What." I replied flatly. He sighed and was silent for a moment.

"How long have you been back?" I wasn't expecting the question, my mouth answered before my brain could stop it.

"Days ... a while."

I kept my head on my knees, my back to him.

"Tamara." Again the softness, but this time my mind was ready, the gentleness came nowhere near me. "You know I have questions." His tone had changed, it was more commanding. I shrugged a response.

A small part of me wanted to turn to him and feel his strength wash over me as it had done so many times before.

I stomped on it.

The small part whimpered away.

"The pendant..." Shingen left the words hanging.

"Kenshin has it, well, he thinks he has it."

More silence followed, I knew I had not said anything useful. I slipped the robe off my right shoulder and heard Shingen take a sharp intake of air. Personally, I had no idea what was there. I put my robe back in place, thinking that I would still keep the secret of my improved range of understanding.

"A woman did it to me – to help me."

I could imagine Lord Shingen having a hundred more questions than he started with. He stood up and walked around in front of me, kneeling down on the bedding and I raised my eyes just as he was about to wrap his hands around mine.

"Don't." I warned, my eyes ice cold.

He dropped them on his thighs, and as I held his gaze his features focused on my jaw.

"Someone hit you." His eyes turned dark.

I said nothing, my eyes didn't change, I stayed in my quiet empty place, then dropped my head back to my knees. He stood up again, moved around to my right and then came back.

"Tamara." I looked up to see something in his hands – I blinked as a faint echo stirred my heart, then it went flat again. My clothes, the ones Saizo had had made for me and my cloak with the Takeda Clan emblems.

"Thank you Lord Shingen." My tone sounded formal, unemotional. His eyes showed hurt for just a second, then his Lordship returned within the amber.

"Rest well Tamara, I will expect you in the Hall come morning." It was a command, not a request.

"Yes milord." My reply was a flat tone.

With that he left. I hugged my knees, looking at the clothes in front of me for a while, and then carefully laid back down.

I don't know how long I stared at the ceiling, but at some point I must have fallen back to sleep.

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